What the Hoon?

Hey all, Jack Wylder here. Did you know that Larry has an official fan group on Facebook? https://www.facebook.com/groups/99503651773/ One of the things we’ve noticed is that there are a lot of folks new to Larry’s books and it can be daunting when you join a group to not get the inside jokes. This post is intended to remedy that a bit. If you see something we’ve missed, just drop it in the comments and we’ll add to this as needed. Ladies, Gentlemen, and Hunters of all sorts CorreiaTech is proud to present:

What the HOON?

(as compiled by Jesse Barrett, official CorreiaTech Minion first class)

The Monster Hunter Nation is populated by some… interesting people. We hold a Manatee in such respect that it’s almost reverence and attempt to speak his language (often assisted by FaceBook’s Translate function). We tell alt-history stories about a blue muppet doing black ops. Most of all, though, we are fans of the writings of Larry Correia.
As often happens, a number of unusual in jokes have developed over time. This is an attempt to explain a few of them for the newer members of MHN.

International Lord of Hate (ILoH)
ɪntərˈnæʃənəl lɔrd ʌv heɪt
(Title)

Back in 2014 the Guardian published an article slandering Larry, who decided to rebut their piece in a Fisk. https://monsterhunternation.com/2014/04/15/larry-f-correia-international-lord-of-hate/
Not to be confused with the Interdimensional Lord of Hate, Larry Correia of Earth Earth #345-B-98081.

HOON!
huːn
(Noun, Verb, Adj, other)

1) The sound made by a Manatee, the inflection being the key to understanding the meaning.
Example: Hoon!*
2) The Battle Cry of Wendell’s Roughnecks.
Example: HOOOOON!
3) A comment made by a citizen of MHN, usually showing strong support of the previous comment.
Example: HOON!
See Also: Maniteese, Facebook’s Translate ‘feature’.
*It is important to note that while HOON! is perfectly acceptable, HOON! is considered vulgar and offensive.

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Wendell D. Manatee
Wen-duhl dee ma-nə-ˌtē
(Proper Noun)

CFO of CorreiaTech, the most powerful mega corporation in Earth #345-B-98081’s universe and manufacturer of the CombatWombat pistol. Wendell is originally from the alternate universe of the Christmas Noun and Tom Stranger short stories. Since that universe allows for interdimensional travel, Wendell often appears in this universe where he is practically worshiped by the citizens of MHN. Wendell got an MBA from Harvard, before serving several years in the Florida state legislature. That, coupled with his logistical and tactical genius during the manatees’ war against the Deep Ones, put his resume at the top of the pile when CorreiaTech started looking for a new CFO. Then he just blew them away with his eloquence during the interviews. Although he is primarily a CoD player, he still regularly beats Larry Correia at World of Tanks. Wendell usually travels in a mobile tank that bears a passing resemblance to the Spice Tanks used by Guild Navigators in Dune but has also on occasion made appearance in his prototype tank walker suit. In every known universe, Wendell is unanimously recognized as the most interesting Man(atee) alive. Fun fact: General Mattis and Wendell hang out. Once he retired, Wendell taught the General how to snorkle, and he introduced Wendell to home brewing.
Wendell appears to have his own Twitter and Facebook accounts, as well as giving interviews on occasion.
https://twitter.com/wendellmanatee
https://www.facebook.com/Wendell.The.Manatee/
http://superversivesf.com/2016/01/06/interview-sad-puppies-wendell-the-manatee/

See Also: You’re kidding right? $)(*& tank dwelling Hax0r!

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Cookie Monster
ku̇-kē män-stər
(Proper Noun)

During the 2012 presidential election, someone posted a meme on Facebook about how electing Romney would kill Sesame Street. Larry chimed in and performed possibly the greatest thread hijacking of all time, beginning with the line “Except Cookie Monster. Because that dude is a straight up hard core operator… Conservative too” followed immediately by “And Cookie Monster is in favor of teaching war rather than reading. The dude is a freaking killing machine. He was in my mercenary company in Bosnia. I saw Cookie Monster massacre a whole village once… We paid him in cookies.”Things really got rolling after that and stories of Big Blue’s out of control black ops exploits are still whispered around MHN to this day. It would appear that his public face as a cookie gobbling star of children’s television is just a cover his real work as a covert operative nominally in service of the US government. Unfortunately, just as he does when faced with piles of tasty snacks, CM often loses his fragile self control, and when he is packing an under barrel EZ Bake the results are best left to the imagination… David Burkhead archived the whole thing on his blog and it can still be viewed there in it’s entirety. https://monsterhunternation.com/2013/07/17/the-great-cookie-monster-thread/

See Also: Muppets, really? Where did all these crumbs and blood come from?

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Tom Stranger
Tahm strān-jər
(Proper Noun)

Tom Stranger is an Interdimensional Insurance Agent from Earth #345-B-98081 who often travels across the multiverse, caring for his client’s needs, and providing quality customer service. Tom always strives for perfect tens on all customer satisfaction surveys (or fives, when a world’s rating system is based upon stars, smiley faces, or stickers.) His job takes him to many worlds, where he deals with a variety of insurance related, sometime apocalyptic crises. On Earth 169-J-00561, Larry Correia (the writer) documented a day in the life of Mr. Stranger and released it as an Audible book (read by the Adam Baldwin of Earth 169-J-00561 where he is an actor instead of the president and leader of the Libertarian Space Cowboy Revolution.) The entire saga can be read at: https://monsterhunternation.com/online-fiction/

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Superfluous Marketing Dog™
su̇-ˈpər-flü-əs / mär-kə-tiŋ / däg
(Proper Noun)

When super author Jim Butcher told Larry Corriea that he needed to add a dog (that did NOT get eaten), Larry created an adorable marketing ploy as revealed in CHRISTMAS NOUN 8: Too Noun Much Adjective. Superfluous Marketing Dog™ plush toys were intended to be sold across the all universes, but insider espionage resulted in a delay on sales to Earth 169-J-00561.
https://monsterhunternation.com/2015/12/18/christmas-noun-8-too-noun-much-adjective/ See Also: Awwwww! The original “It’s So Fluffy!”.

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Clamps, NickWolf, and various other Internet Trolls
(Sort of) (Proper Nouns)
Unlike Melvin, MHI’s IT Troll, some internet trolls just can’t be reformed. Two notorious examples are NickWolf and Clamps. NickWolf was featured in several blog posts on MHN, where he kept coming back for abuse like a baby seal out for a night on the town. Clamps, on the other hand, is a more sad and sinister figure who is quite literally under police orders to have all of his internet activities monitored by his caretakers. He sometimes slips the leash and crops up on MHN or the various blogs of Larry’s friends and associates.
https://monsterhunternation.com/best-of-mhn/

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Yard Moose Mountain
yärd / müs / mau̇n-tən
(Proper Noun)

Yard Moose Mountain, Utah is the Semi-Secret Base™ and Home of Clan Correia. It got the name when Larry looked out the window of his Secret Base™ and noticed that there was a moose in his yard. The legend soon grew and spread to all corners of Monster Hunter Nation. Larry has recently purchased a mountain and is working on Yard Moose Mountain 2.0, which will include, among other things, a zip line from the gun tower to the mailbox…
https://monsterhunternation.com/2016/02/19/yard-moose-mountain-2/

See Also: What, no volcano? ..with frickin laser beams on their heads, Outpost: Hippo River, Outpost: Burning Lizard

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Straw Larry
str-aw / lahree
(Proper Noun)

You know how in TV shows the protagonist always gets split into “good” and “evil?” Or how in FAMILY CIRCUS there is “Not Me,” who is guilty of everything? Straw Larry is who is responsible for all the evil Larry Correia has been accused of, but hasn’t actually done. CHRISTMAS NOUN 8 describes him thusly:

Straw Larry was a hideous creature, dredged up from the fevered imagination of thousands of SJWs, given unnatural life through their salty tears of perpetual outrage and powered by their endless butthurt, he was the living embodiment of every awful, nonsensical, conflicting, mutually exclusive, asinine thing they’d ever accused Larry Correia of, made real. He got the name because he was literally a straw man. I guess it just kind of just stuck, what with all the straw and stuff.

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Tactical Melon Baller
(tak-ta-cul meh-luhn baa-lr)
noun
There was  New York Times article about what it takes to be a ‘Modern Man’ that was, in Larry’s words, “so remarkably stupid that it has already been mocked across the entire internet. However, as a manly man of manliness, it is my responsibility to address this piece of fuckwittery. “
One of the points was regarding melon ballers and… well, read for yourself:
https://monsterhunternation.com/2015/10/02/fisking-the-new-york-times-modern-man/
 

Common Internet Shit Gibbon (CISG)

(ka-min in-tur-net shit gib-bon)

Noun

An odious, cowardly creature that primarily gathers on social media sights to interfere with discussions and inject their preprogrammed opinions into every conversation. Well known for their primary tactic of making up shit, throwing it as the wall to see what sticks. For a full explanation see: https://monsterhunternation.com/2020/03/30/this-weeks-episode-of-the-facebook-hunter-the-common-internet-shit-gibbon/


The Department of Fuck Your Job Security (DOFYJS)

(duh·paart·muhnt uhf fuhk yor jaab suh·kyur·uh·tee)

Proper Noun

“if I was President (ha!) I would only create a single new executive branch entity. The Department of Fuck Your Job Security.

The DoFYJS would consist of surly auditors, and their only job would be to go into other government agencies to figure out-

A. Do you fuckers do anything worth a shit?

B. Which of you fuckers actually get shit done?

Then fire everyone else.

For a more thorough reading, see: https://monsterhunternation.com/2022/05/11/the-dofyjs/

Updates
Writers should be Cultural Appropriating all the Awesome Stuff

53 thoughts on “What the Hoon?”

  1. You left out Larry’s role as the ILOH, defined by people who think it’s a microagression to make pronouns and genitalia match…

  2. I hadn’t read that interview with Wendell before. That was beautiful; Wendell truly is the most wise and inspiring manatee of all time.

  3. Face…book. Isn’t that like the Internet Safe Space for liberal douchebags? Why would Larry waste time there instead of writing awesome fiction to GET PAID?

      1. you have not seen all of tumblr then.

        its just a blogging platform with all sorts of communities represented on it, it just for the reason of them being the loudest, tends to be associated with SJW, but they are actualy a relative minority. the rest is various fandoms, people of every possible political affiliation you can imagine, there are multiple gun porn blogs there, etc.

        Facebook… has its issues as well, but all you really have to do is curate your experience. (mostly use facebook to keep in touch with former schoolmates, long distance friends and the like, personaly)

    1. Sometimes the ILOH needs to just smack some fools down and try to stomp some sense into their thick skulls… in a figurative sense, by way of typing words on a keyboard, that is.

  4. Need a link specifically to the Christmas Noun. Found it via another link, but direct link and definition/explanation helpful. Now I’ve got another couple hours of catch-up reading to do!

  5. “What the HOON?” is going to be my new exclamation. It will live next to “Well Pinch My Loaf” which is used when I need to express amazement.

  6. Sad Puppies and the Hugos probably need a mention as well. Also, in the Cookie Monster paragraph, it should read ” It would appear that his public face as a cookie gobbling star of children’s television is just a cover FOR his real work as a covert operative nominally in service of the US government.

    1. Seconded.

      Sad Puppies
      (Pronunciation)
      (Proper Noun)

      Initially a satirical campaign begun by Larry to troll the Hugo Awards by putting action-oriented, fun stories on the ballot that would otherwise never receive consideration, Sad puppies evolved into grassroots movement championed by multiple authors of varying race, gender, and ethnic backgrounds who all thought that story should be considered first over any message in fiction.

      ++++++

      Rabid Puppies
      (Pronunciation)
      (Proper Noun)
      An offshoot from Sad Puppies that was more interested in burning down the Hugo Awards than improving them. See also: Vox Day, Theodore Beale, Castalia House, etc.

      ++++++

      Puppy Kickers
      (Pronunciation)
      (Proper Noun)

      Those opposed to the puppies in every way shape and formk who find a way to deride and disparage them in any and every way possible. See also: CHORFS, SJWs, SFF Literattie, etc.

    1. He also missed the tactical mellon baller. It was a response to a column where the author thought such a tool (in its more domesticated form) was a true symbol of modern manhood. Surprisingly enough, the guy who gave us a gun totting accountant who hunts monsters for a living thought said tool had to be leveled up a bit to be useful.

      1. I’ve never had any reason, nor desire, to ball a melon, but I do have such a device. It got pressed into a nobler service: cookie scoop.

        1. My mother used to use a melon baller to take the seed core out of apples. Slice the apple in half, scoop out the seeds and give the halves to us kids. Only time I’ve ever seen a melon baller used on fruit.

  7. Cismale heterogender normative, the ILoH, melon ballers, Christmas Noun… All need to be written up and added- keep em coming!

    Edited to add:
    Yard Moose Mountain (duh)
    Larry’s various titles
    “Not a real writer” (500+ requirement)
    Sad Puppies
    Rabid Puppies
    Puppy Kickers
    CHORFs

    1. Is the tank thing going to be a running joke?

      How about Lot5R campaigns against the dark oracles of fire and water?

  8. And regarding Cookie Monster, I am old enough to recall (if just barely) watching Sesame Street on an NBC affiliate. “Operating in the public interest” and all for that station, years before there was any PBS station in the area.

  9. You forgot “real writer”. It’s a running joke that Larry isn’t a real writer because his stories don’t advance Social Justice and people actually like to read them.

    For example, when one of Larry’s works makes NYT or Amazon best seller lists the joke is “One day you’ll be a real writer, Larry”.

    1. Yeah, that’s a good one. Apparently “has former child actor (who now only plays himself on that sit-com about really smart geeks) as a friend” is one of the criteria.

  10. For some reason I always go the BBC “Top Gear” method of talking about a secret base, IE “And the International Lord of Hate retreats to not write at his secret Yard Moose Mountain complex, just of Hwy XYZ exit 14…”

    1. Yep, definitely! Also, Clamps is not listed in the Troll list; but eh. If there is one particular post or two that should be linked re: Clamps, it’s the one where he argues that he’s ‘a better writer’ than Larry, and a bunch of other authors.

      Actually, the Author Alphabetical List of Success should be listed there (on the Best of MHN) too, because of the running joke of Larry being a ‘subpar author.’

      PS: @Jack: the link to the Bets of MHN subcategory doesn’t work.

        1. The ‘how to be a professional author’ is under the writing section, but under politics, fisking and trolls, Nickwolf’s the only entries I see (I just checked, but I may be mistaken.)

          TBH, if there was going to be a link, it would’ve been better to link from “How To…” in the relevant section, to the particular conversation with Clamps. (Which is in the comments under ‘A great article…’)

          On the other hand, it’s probably the best illustrative one of his abject idiocy on display, so maybe a single link to it under ‘trolls’ would suffice.

          OT, more directed at Larry and Jack: I was digging through the comments at the Best of MHN and found this: https://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2013/07/24/the-mhi-rpg-and-employee-handbook-is-available-for-everyone/

          I wonder if those will ever be available again. I don’t play as much RPG as I used to (not enough people to play with) but I still love reading sourcebooks. Mash up between Dresden Files RPG and MHI RPG? Sounds like fun! (if they’re still available the links are dead, leading to an ‘error’ page for me.)

  11. I believe the stories about Cookie Monster. Never did trust those Muppets — particularly the ones who stayed on Sesame Street and didn’t go Capitalist with Disney.

    Remember the photos of Osama bin Laden with Bert?

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