I just signed 1,000 bookplates for Monster Hunter Alpha. I’ve got some left. Any of you that work at a bookstore, if you would like some, post your mailing address here with an approximate quantity that you would like.
Fun with Pictures time! MHI Zippo, Real Men of Genius, Yard Moose, and More!
I’ve mentioned the Earl Harbinger Zippo that was sent to me as a present from some fans before, but have always forgotten to take a picture. But I’ve been on a kick of playing wth my iPhone, so here goes.
You can even see my fingers in the reflection. Those fingers can type 85 words per minute, baby.
Next up, we took our annual Summer trip to Lagoon last week. For those of you that remember this: http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2010/06/17/lagoon-its-what-fun-is-until-it-kicks-you-in-the-groin/ Here is a better picture of the Ody-Sea. It hungers for your gonads.
Up here in the mountains where I live, we’ve got all sorts of animals. I got a picture of this big girl when I was pulling into my driveway the other day. I was able to get this picture out the window of a moving Taurus before she got away.
This next picture is to illustrate my finely tuned problem solving skillz. I needed to edit the other night. Editing requires caffeine. I had Coke Zero. However, the kids had used all of my big cups, and since editing requires Coke Zero by the gallon, I couldn’t use a small cup. Plus, it was warm, and that meant I needed to put ice in it. A 2 liter bottle is like a cup, but the ice cubes from the ice maker were too big to fit through the hole in the top… Insurmountable problem?
TAh DAh! So I cut a hole in the side of the bottle and shoved ice cubes through. Then to prevent leakage (because in the heat of editing, I can’t be expected to remember to keep the hole pointed up) I covered it in duct tape. Mission accomplished. I am a Real Man of Genius.
And to think that Barack Obama says that us best selling authors don’t earn our money! Ha! Showed him!
Our next two pictures were sent in by members of the Monster Hunter Nation. Both were from MHI themed birthday parties.
And these folks dressed up as MHI characters for a party. My favorite is the Elf Queen in the red mu-mu and the G-nome.
The Monster Hunter Nation… Well armed and not afraid to dress up!
As many of you know, I have many geeky hobbies. I am either a King of Nerds, or a King-Sized Nerd (or so Bob Westover says,. Thanks a lot, Bob). In the past I’ve built custom MHI action figures. Now I’m trying my hand at painting minis. (I’m still learning on the small stuff, so no pics yet). However, I’m too much of a dork to paint the existing ones. Oh no, I have to make the minis match the actual characters from my monthly Writer Nerd Game Night. (4 novelists, 2 book reviewers, and an artist. About as literate a bunch of nerds as you’ll find). So last night I sawed one figures head off and glued it onto somebody else’s body.
Now I just need to learn how to paint a kubuki face and I’m good to hook. This one is for Paul Genesse.
And now for your amusement, here is a picture of a wombat.
I did not take this picture. But wombats just make me laugh. He he he.
Utah book signings!
I’ve got two book signings scheduled for the release of Monster Hunter Alpha.
Saturday July 30th, from 12:30-2:30 I will be at the Jordan Landing B&N. Then later that day, from 4-8, I will be at the Layton B&N. Drop by and say hi!
Obama says I'm not off the hook.
The secret is out. Watch and learn.
Now you know the truth. A secret cabal of bestselling writers has been sabotaging the US economy all this time. Sure, you may have thought that our situation was caused by stuff like out of control government spending, or onerous regulations, or our complete lack of coherent energy policy, or the devaluation of the dollar, or people/companies living beyond their means and then expecting the tax payers to bail them out, or entitlements that are mathematically impossible to pay, or employers being afraid to hire because of fear of ObamaCare and coming taxes, or the quadrupling of our debt over the last couple of years, but NO. That would be silly!
It has been because of us bestselling authors all along.
If only we paid our fair share, then all your problems would go away.
Yes, I am a New York Times bestselling author, and as such (according to our esteemed President who would never embellish the truth) I am part of the problem. It was a good feeling to get a book on the bestseller list, but then all my dreams came true when I was given my Secret Bestselling Author Tax-Evasion Decoder Ring.
I recall with great fondness my first meeting with this illustrious secret society of bestselling novelists at the Bohemian Roundtable Pizza. Michael Crichton was presiding (he’s not really dead, he just didn’t want to fill out his 1040ES for that quarter’s royalties). I was taught the Secret Handshake, the Mysterious Loophole, the Truth about Global Warming, and then we had milkshakes. Afterward, Robert Heinlein and I stole a flying saucer from Area 51, went joyriding, and laser-mutilated some cows just to mess with people. It was totally awesome. You guys really should write bestselling novels too. I can’t recommend it enough.
So yeah, being a bestseller is pretty sweet, but when I found out this morning that it also upsets Barack Obama, it became soooooooo much sweeter.
You might be saying, “But Correia, don’t you still have a day job?” And I’d say, why yes I do. In fact, I have a full time job as a finance manager and I spend the equivalent number of hours of a second full time job writing novels. And then you would say “But Correia, didn’t you complain back on tax day about what an unreasonably high percentage of your royalties you have to send to the government in quarterly self-employment withholdings?” And I might reply with, SHUT UP! I AM TOO PART OF A SUPER AWESOME SECRET SOCIETY! The president said so!
“Now now, Correia… Even though you’ve gotten onto the NYT bestseller list, you’re just a working stiff like the rest of us, aren’t you?”
*Sniff* Nu uh… Milkshakes and space aliens with the guy that wrote Andromeda Strain!
Okay, you got me. I work two full-time jobs. My wife has been a stay-at-home mom for the last 11 years. That was our choice and we were glad to make the sacrifice, because I have intelligent, awesome, confident, well-behaved kids. We live in a really nice house in the mountains that I bought because some rich people overextended themselves and I was ready to swoop in with a down payment because we’d scrimped, saved, and spent the last 7 years in a cheap house that we had bought out of foreclosure. I have never bought a new car nor made a car payment. We are very frugal. I’ve never paid interest on a credit card in my life, and pay off the full balance every month. I did the debt snowball and paid off my student loans 6 years early. I have an emergency fund, but no extra fun money because I’ve been making double house payments in the hopes of not having any debt whatsoever. Then, when the mortgage is gone in a couple years, I plan to just be a writer, and only work something easy, like 50 or 60 hours a week.
Despite the fact that I grew up poor, put myself through college and was poor, got married and started having kids in college and was poor, then scraped and fought and worked until I broke into the middle-class, then started my own business and became poor again, then sold the business and was unemployed and poor, then finally found a great job and started climbing out of the hole, then started selling books, and all of a sudden…
According to Obama, I’m rich! Good thing I’m a workaholic!
Now, once a quarter I get to send the government a gigantic chunk of what I make. The harder I work, the higher a percentage they take. When I complain about this, liberals tell me that I should be thankful that I get to live in America, where despite the fact that I’ve tried really hard my whole life to make good choices, I have the privilege of paying for their bad choices! Wow. When you put it that way, it sure does sound like I’m one of those rich guys, soaking the system.
The president just warned me that I’m not off the hook, though. Thank goodness. I would hate for somebody to look at where I am today and think that I’d gotten here through working really hard and making good decisions, even though they were difficult or painful!
Oh, and I just LOVE the end of the video, where the president says that nobody is talking about raising taxes right now. He’s not going to raise taxes until 2013! (which is so very far way. We’ll have flying cars and jetpacks by then!). 2013 is like a whole year and a half in the future… Right after the next presidential election, when hopefully we can finally toss this narcissistic douche bag out of the office, so then he’ll only be a bestselling author.
But he’s totally not invited to the meetings.
EDIT: And since I just got an Instalanche, why look at this, a list of my books that are available for sale. http://www.amazon.com/gp/search/ref=sr_tc_2_0?rh=i%3Astripbooks%2Ck%3ALarry+Correia&keywords=Larry+Correia&ie=UTF8&qid=1310441916&sr=1-2-ent&field-contributor_id=B002D68HL8 Every one of these sold will help my continued domination of the US economy! 🙂
2 Weeks until MONSTER HUNTER ALPHA!
Yep. We are down to just two weeks until MHA starts shipping. Please tell your friends!
It will be available for the Nook or Kindle, you just need to go here: http://www.webscription.net/p-1416-monster-hunter-alpha.aspx And there are free sample chapters there too.
Autographed copies are available from Uncle Hugos: http://www.unclehugo.com/prod/ah-correia-larry.php
If you are curious as to why I keep bugging everybody to preorder it or buy it the week it comes out, here is the explanation: http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2011/06/30/i-need-a-favor-from-the-monster-hunter-nation/
And sort of related, remember that you can become a voting member of WorldCon (where I just so happen to be nominated for the Campbell award) and it is actually a pretty good deal because of all the stuff you get: http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2011/05/24/why-spending-50-to-be-eligible-to-vote-for-the-hugos-is-actually-a-really-good-deal/ Clock is ticking on this one though and the voting will be closed soon.