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Git 'er done. 1899 style.

I read this essay recently. It is relatively well known. It was written in 1899, and it is just as true today.

A Message to Garcia

By Elbert Hubbard

In all this Cuban business there is one man stands out on the horizon of my memory like Mars at perihelion. When war broke out between Spain & the United States, it was very necessary to communicate quickly with the leader of the Insurgents. Garcia was somewhere in the mountain vastness of Cuba- no one knew where. No mail nor telegraph message could reach him. The President must secure his cooperation, and quickly.

What to do!

Some one said to the President, “There’s a fellow by the name of Rowan will find Garcia for you, if anybody can.”

Rowan was sent for and given a letter to be delivered to Garcia. How “the fellow by the name of Rowan” took the letter, sealed it up in an oil-skin pouch, strapped it over his heart, in four days landed by night off the coast of Cuba from an open boat, disappeared into the jungle, & in three weeks came out on the other side of the Island, having traversed a hostile country on foot, and delivered his letter to Garcia, are things I have no special desire now to tell in detail.

The point I wish to make is this: McKinley gave Rowan a letter to be delivered to Garcia; Rowan took the letter and did not ask, “Where is he at?” By the Eternal! there is a man whose form should be cast in deathless bronze and the statue placed in every college of the land. It is not book-learning young men need, nor instruction about this and that, but a stiffening of the vertebrae which will cause them to be loyal to a trust, to act promptly, concentrate their energies: do the thing- “Carry a message to Garcia!”

General Garcia is dead now, but there are other Garcias.

No man, who has endeavored to carry out an enterprise where many hands were needed, but has been well nigh appalled at times by the imbecility of the average man- the inability or unwillingness to concentrate on a thing and do it. Slip-shod assistance, foolish inattention, dowdy indifference, & half-hearted work seem the rule; and no man succeeds, unless by hook or crook, or threat, he forces or bribes other men to assist him; or mayhap, God in His goodness performs a miracle, & sends him an Angel of Light for an assistant. You, reader, put this matter to a test: You are sitting now in your office- six clerks are within call.

Summon any one and make this request: “Please look in the encyclopedia and make a brief memorandum for me concerning the life of Correggio”.

Will the clerk quietly say, “Yes, sir,” and go do the task?

On your life, he will not. He will look at you out of a fishy eye and ask one or more of the following questions:

Who was he?

Which encyclopedia?

Where is the encyclopedia?

Was I hired for that?

Don’t you mean Bismarck?

What’s the matter with Charlie doing it?

Is he dead?

Is there any hurry?

Shan’t I bring you the book and let you look it up yourself?

What do you want to know for?

And I will lay you ten to one that after you have answered the questions, and explained how to find the information, and why you want it, the clerk will go off and get one of the other clerks to help him try to find Garcia- and then come back and tell you there is no such man. Of course I may lose my bet, but according to the Law of Average, I will not.

Now if you are wise you will not bother to explain to your “assistant” that Correggio is indexed under the C’s, not in the K’s, but you will smile sweetly and say, “Never mind,” and go look it up yourself.

And this incapacity for independent action, this moral stupidity, this infirmity of the will, this unwillingness to cheerfully catch hold and lift, are the things that put pure Socialism so far into the future. If men will not act for themselves, what will they do when the benefit of their effort is for all? A first-mate with knotted club seems necessary; and the dread of getting “the bounce” Saturday night, holds many a worker to his place.

Advertise for a stenographer, and nine out of ten who apply, can neither spell nor punctuate- and do not think it necessary to.

Can such a one write a letter to Garcia?

“You see that bookkeeper,” said the foreman to me in a large factory.

“Yes, what about him?”

“Well he’s a fine accountant, but if I’d send him up town on an errand, he might accomplish the errand all right, and on the other hand, might stop at four saloons on the way, and when he got to Main Street, would forget what he had been sent for.”

Can such a man be entrusted to carry a message to Garcia?

We have recently been hearing much maudlin sympathy expressed for the “downtrodden denizen of the sweat-shop” and the “homeless wanderer searching for honest employment,” & with it all often go many hard words for the men in power.

Nothing is said about the employer who grows old before his time in a vain attempt to get frowsy ne’er-do-wells to do intelligent work; and his long patient striving with “help” that does nothing but loaf when his back is turned. In every store and factory there is a constant weeding-out process going on. The employer is constantly sending away “help” that have shown their incapacity to further the interests of the business, and others are being taken on. No matter how good times are, this sorting continues, only if times are hard and work is scarce, the sorting is done finer- but out and forever out, the incompetent and unworthy go.

It is the survival of the fittest. Self-interest prompts every employer to keep the best- those who can carry a message to Garcia.

I know one man of really brilliant parts who has not the ability to manage a business of his own, and yet who is absolutely worthless to any one else, because he carries with him constantly the insane suspicion that his employer is oppressing, or intending to oppress him. He cannot give orders; and he will not receive them. Should a message be given him to take to Garcia, his answer would probably be, “Take it yourself.”

Tonight this man walks the streets looking for work, the wind whistling through his threadbare coat. No one who knows him dare employ him, for he is a regular fire-brand of discontent. He is impervious to reason, and the only thing that can impress him is the toe of a thick-soled No. 9 boot.

Of course I know that one so morally deformed is no less to be pitied than a physical cripple; but in our pitying, let us drop a tear, too, for the men who are striving to carry on a great enterprise, whose working hours are not limited by the whistle, and whose hair is fast turning white through the struggle to hold in line dowdy indifference, slip-shod imbecility, and the heartless ingratitude, which, but for their enterprise, would be both hungry & homeless.

Have I put the matter too strongly? Possibly I have; but when all the world has gone a-slumming I wish to speak a word of sympathy for the man who succeeds- the man who, against great odds has directed the efforts of others, and having succeeded, finds there’s nothing in it: nothing but bare board and clothes.

I have carried a dinner pail & worked for day’s wages, and I have also been an employer of labor, and I know there is something to be said on both sides. There is no excellence, per se, in poverty; rags are no recommendation; & all employers are not rapacious and high-handed, any more than all poor men are virtuous.

My heart goes out to the man who does his work when the “boss” is away, as well as when he is at home. And the man who, when given a letter for Garcia, quietly take the missive, without asking any idiotic questions, and with no lurking intention of chucking it into the nearest sewer, or of doing aught else but deliver it, never gets “laid off,” nor has to go on a strike for higher wages. Civilization is one long anxious search for just such individuals. Anything such a man asks shall be granted; his kind is so rare that no employer can afford to let him go. He is wanted in every city, town and village- in every office, shop, store and factory. The world cries out for such: he is needed, & needed badly- the man who can carry a message to Garcia.

THE END-

So I joined Facebook…

http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000028145065&ref=name

People have been bugging me to join up for awhile. I’ve gotten a bunch of invites, and today Bogie posted on this blog about it, telling me that if I’m trying to spread the word about the upcoming release of my book, I’m missing the boat by not being on Facebook.

I’ve kind of put it off, because I’m not really the social networking kind of guy. I’m more of a hermit in a compound surrounded by barb-wire and claymores type… well, not really that bad, but I am all about selling lots of books. I’m a capitalist like that.

Lo and behold, there is already an MHI group! http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000028145065&ref=name#/group.php?gid=99503651773&ref=mf Hunters Unite!

Okay, that was a little mind blowing. I’m still not entirely used to the idea of having fans, though it is pretty awesome.

Great list of books that are releasing the same month as MHI

http://fantasybookcritic.blogspot.com/2009/07/spotlight-on-july-2009-books.html

They put some serious work into that.

And as a nerd, I must admit that I clicked on every single Amazon link, just to see how I was ranking compared to the others. There were only five that were ahead of me, and one of those was Dean Koontz. So I’ll call that a win.  There are some interesting ones on there, and it is just a bummer that when you become a writer, it kills most of your reading time. If I’m reading, I feel like I should be writing. Though I’m currently reading George R. R. Martin’s Game of Thrones. (just as amazing as everyone has said it is). I just finished Paul Gennesse’s Dragon Hunters (2nd book of great series) and DanWells’ I Am Not A Serial Killer (awesome first novel). Plus I’ve got two history books on Black Jack Pershing, but that’s business.

Amazon sales rankings are odd though, they do it by the hour, so in one day, I can swing 100,000 places back and forth, so you never really know. Plus I still have no idea how many of the Baen books have been sold so far. So I feel like I’m doing okay…

Questions for the wisdom of the internets

1. Does anybody have a picture of the prototype Browning BAR from the 1950s that was in bullpup format?

I heard such a thing existed, so I need to see it!

2. Is it true the new KneeCapping Trade bill includes a provision where you have to get your home inspected for environmental stuff before you can sell it, unless your mortgage is from Fanny or Freddy?

Got this on the radio, but unconfirmed, because you know, nobody in congress could bother to actually read a 1300 page bill with the largest tax increase in history that will destroy two million jobs, break the dollar, and assure China’s place as the world’s superpower for the next generation, before they voted.

3. Does anybody actually care about Michael Jackson?

Seriously. Shut up already.

4. Do my blog postings seem “angry”, or “full of hate”, or “maniacal”, or do I have “right wing-extremist” views, Or am I “a bitter rasist” (no, that’s how they spelled it) whenever I post about politics?

All from actual e-mails. The really nasty ones get marked as spam. And actually, if you aren’t angry right now, then you haven’t been paying attention. So yes, I am angry. I’m not however “Rasist”. I do not, nor have I ever worshiped the Babylonian sponge-god Ras. Way too much flagellation and scourging for my tastes, but if you’re into that whole invertebra romance thing, it isn’t my place to judge.

5. Is global warming sorry, climate change, such a bad thing if it turns Utah into Seattle (in a good way, with lots of rain, not hippes)?

We had record rain fall in June. This is the greenest I’ve ever seen this brown state, which is kind of a brownish-green at best, but hey, I’ll take it. Plus my garden is looking awesome. Or I should say, my wife’s garden, because I’m only good for killing things and having allergy attacks. I actually have a black thumb. I don’t garden. I execute plants by condemning them to a slow withering death until they are devoured by snails.

On that note, it is so cute when your kids are well read, but haven’t heard how the words are pronounced. So when I was surveying all the snails my wife poisoned, I asked my daughter if she knew that the French ate snails, and she answered, “Yes, they called it Escargets.”

6. Government sponsored health care… Seriously… WTF?

No comment. Too filled with maniacal hate-rage-malice and blood shooting form my eyes getting all over keyboard. Maybe I should get that looked at, but then I’d have to stand in line for six years so a doctor imported from Baluchistan could shake some chicken bones over me or something.

 7. Do I really look that much like James Gandolfini?

I got this one. Yes.

Anybody seen the Mexican? The one where he plays a gay hitman? Yep. I look just like him in that one. Only I’m neither gay, nor a hitman, but that’s pretty much what I look like. I also bear a suspicious resemblance to the big guy who did the Donkey Show in Clerks II. MadOgre called me at home three seconds after the movie was over and told me I had to rent it.

So yes, I look like a donkey-molesting mafia don.

8. Have any of the geniuses in congress paused to think that something like, I don’t know, ALL medical breakthroughs have come from people inspired by profit, and most of those have come from America, and that the world’s medical research will pretty much end once we have Socialized Health Care?

I can’t answer this one, but look at the words Socialized Health Care… doesn’t that seem oxymoronic? You don’t really think of Care and Socialism going together. I think that the only medical research Stalin supported was that thing where he tried to breed a Super-Ape Army.  The only thing socialists “care” about is staying in power.

9. If you could clone one Founding Father, and stick him in congress, who would it be?

I don’t know… which one shot Hamilton?

Tough question. I think philosophically I would like John Adams, but the time for reasoned discourse might be past, and it would be really fun to watch Sam Adams punch Harry Reid in the face, then bust out the tar and feathers.

10. And finally, Monster Hunter International vs. My Little Pony in a grudge match to the death! WHO WILL WIN?

I don’t know, but if it was directed by Michael Bay, there would be lots of explosions.