So I just got a 24 hour ban from Facebook for Violating Community Standards, because I insulted the imaginary people of an imaginary country. Which is kinda hilarious.
Long version. About a year ago an author friend of mine was putting up snippets of his alternative history story, in which the fictional country (Neu Saxony) experienced a terrorist attack. One guy thought it was real, and a whole bunch of us ended up having fun arguing on behalf of our made up countries about who was really responsible. It was pretty funny.
I ,of course, came to the aid of noble Krasnovia, a nation of peaceful sandwich makers, who were being falsely accused of these heinous crimes. (We were obviously framed)
So a year later the memory reminder thing on FB is bringing this back up. Another friend of mine created this post:
Remember your brothers killed by Krasnovians. #OnlyGoodKrasnovianIsADeadKrasnovian
Now let me share with you the silliness which ensued, which resulted in my terrible violation of community standards.
- Eudyptes Diabolicus: the media never warns people about the krasnovian menace. I think they’ve been corrupted
- Jarrad E Truog: Eudyptes Diabolicus collusion
- Larry Correia: I am disgusted by your Krasnoviphobia.
- Jarrad E Truog: Larry Correia look man you weren’t there when the Horde cut down my men
- Eudyptes Diabolicus: It’s not a phobia. It’s rational caution
- Larry Correia: Krasnovians are a proud people, known for their fine sandwiches, and genocide, but mostly the sandwiches.
- Cathe Smith: If only they could approach the genocide with the same careful attention to detail that they approach sandwich making.
- Jarrade E Truog: Larry Correia I didn’t think we had a Krasnovian Apologist here.
- Larry Correia: I’m a member KAIR. Krasnovian American I something Relations.
- Jarrad E Truog: I knew it.
- Cathe Smith: Krasnovian American Interfellowship Relations
- Jarrad E Truog: The Neu Saxony princess was murdered by Krasnovian Separatists #NeuSaxonyStrong
- Larry Correia: That’s a conspiracy theory! There were Krasnovian immigrant members of the brave Uhlans lost that terrible day.
- Eudyptes Diabolicus: suicide assassins don’t get to be counted as “lost”
- CJ Hyatt: As a card carrying Mojavian, Krasnovia can ETADIK.
- Jarrad E Truog: LOL
- Harman Meyerhoff: Free Nogovia!
- Larry Correia: It’s sad, just because you invade a country and genocide a bunch of Pinelandians one time, everybody forgets about all the wonderful things Krasnovians have given to the world… like the waffle maker, or… uh… well, several different AK-47 variants.
- Jarrad E Truog: I mean they are Communists so are they really people?
- Cathe Smith: Admittedly, the use of a waffle maker in perpetuating a genocide was a new spin on things.
- Larry Correia: Indeed, those Pinelandian dogs never saw that coming! HA HA! Oh, wait… err… I mean, that was a tragic misunderstanding over a border incident, in which the peaceful Krasnovians were unjustly attacked.
- Eudyptes Diabolicus: Just because those pinelandian scum are scum doesn’t excuse krasnovian aggression
- Cathe Smith: The Pinelandians aggressively planted Pinelandian pine trees on Krasnovian soil.
- Larry Correia: It wasn’t aggression. It was self defense! Our column of T-80s were just minding their own business when set upon by savage Pinelandian villagers.
- Jarrad E Truog: Were they minding their own business in Pinelandia?
And my comment which got deleted for violating community standards…
- Larry Correia: It was a “disputed” area, originally settled by peaceful Krasnovian sandwich makers, and then invaded and occupied by filthy Pinelandian goat rapists.

##
So there you go. I’m banned from Facebook for 24 hours. Rest easy everyone, Mark Zuckerberg is on the case! Facebook will not tolerate satirical posts about a bunch of genocidal sandwich makers saying cruel things about people from an imaginary country.
I will admit, when I saw the ban window pop up for my cruel attack on Pinelandians, it was the best laugh I’ve had in a while. 😀
I currently have bans for posting a picture of a Muslim woman on a carnival ride as “hate speech,” another for a joke involving a mention of rape as a horrible act of war, and one for a comment I made two years ago.
You need to step up your game.
Also, Cuckerberg should be raped to death by rampant wildebeests.
What have wildebeests ever done you, MadMike?
I can’t find any rampant wildebeasts, but I might be able to fine some laid back ones. Will that do?
You mean the ones from Colorado with the haze around them?
If they aren’t rampant, they’re not going to be much good for rape, man.
Rampant, SANDWICH-MAKING wildebeests
That’s cruelty to wildebeests.
Rabid wildebeests!
I’m waiting for the Snopes article about the truth behind Krasnovia vs Pinelandia.
Wait in vain, they will never reveal the truth, no matter the torture!
They’re too busy fact-checking the Babylon Bee.
I wouldn’t hold it against Snopes for doing that — after all, satire has been hard to distinguish from news, and so Snopes has had to fact-check even the Onion from time to time.
The problem comes when Snopes is used for a reason to ban something; indeed, the Babylon Bee had been banned from posting things on Facebook at one point for being “fake news”.
Even that wouldn’t bother me so much, had Snopes not lost all credibility years ago, and is nothing more than a fake news website itself.
That would be perfect. Especially if they said Larry’s claims were false and linked to any article in a lame attempt to prove their decision.
Joe in PNG wins the thread.
Ooooh, yes. And I can’t WAIT to see the reaction.
If you made this up no one would believe it!
The inmates have taken over the asylum across the whole Western World
Heinlein’s “Crazy Years” are in full swing, all we need is that charismatic preacher to collect the ignorant and we’ll duplicate his future history less Valentine Michael Smith.
NOT “THE CRAZY YEARS”.
The “Age Of Limited Choices” from _Fallen Angels_ (Chapter Two, specifically — available from the Baen Free Library, no less. >:) )
After the preacher we can have The New Crusade! No one ever expects the new crusade.
Are these the same people who are “fact checking” satire articles by The Babylon Bee?
:-0)
Anyone want to bet if the Cookie Monster thread 1&2 would result in bans if it were to happen today on FB?
I enjoy the interchanges I have and read on Faceplant. However, stuff like this really is worrisome. It perfectly illustrates to problems with doing most of the vetting via algorithm. Computers are literal minded and often awfully stupid. The mad hatter rides again!
The Cookie Monster thread can still today be the cause of bans, even though it’s years old.
Don’t forget John Adam, AKA Special Ops Cody.
That’s what you get for being a KAIR member
As you deserve, insulting my noble homeland of Pinelandia! You can’t even call it by it’s proper ancient name, Pinus Cembranostia! Filthy Krasnovian pigdog!
Is a pigdog what you get when a small bulldog wallows in mud?
Or maybe what you get when you domesticate a pig as a pet?
No. A pigdog is what you get when . . . well, it would be obvious if you’d get your mind back in the gutter where it belongs.
I would say that, much as a bird dog is a dog for hunting birds, a pigdog is a dog for hunting pigs…
…but that would be a boaring answer.
I too got put in FB jail for the audacity of using a popular word that begins with the 6th character of the alphabet preceded by the word goat.
Apparently the FB moderators don’t take it lightly when someone denigrates their favorite pastime.
Dang…Now you have some free time from beating pinatas, hopefully, you see my reply 🙂
Are you free around the weekend of March 7 and 8? We’re having a con and would like you as a guest. I’ve asked Wylder and Jesse and sent requests to Baen, but no luck. We talked about it a couple of years ago.
If I have to grow up can I be Larry please.
Here Larry goes again with his apologetics for those Kraznovian butchers. Well, not the butchers. Kraznovian butchers are actually a key part of the Kraznovian sandwich making industry.
Just remember, the only good Kraznovian is a dead Kraznovian, or a sandwich shop employee!
You should consider making a profile on mewe.com, Larry. It doesn’t play the censorship games that Facebook does. It’s quiet because there aren’t as many people there, but part of that is because there aren’t many celebrities over there yet. Mad Mike is there, for one.
Sarah Hoyt is there as well
WTF? This is one of the better fails they’ve had in a WHILE, Larry. X-D
It took them that long to finally ban you? Maybe they recalibrated the algorithms.
I wonder if we can get Snopes to fact check this for us?
😀
So if Larry is banned from Facebook, does this mean he will have to pass the time by writing novels so that we can throw our money at him?
Oh, what a shame, what a low-down SHAME that would be… 😉
Truly a tragedy. ~:(
It’s getting to the point where Farcebook bans are like a Captain’s Mast. Never make Chief without one.
I wonder if you can use that as a recommendation or to advertise books and games. Instead of “banned in Boston” it’s now “banned by Facebook?”
It’s only a 24 hour ban. He couldn’t possibly write more than two or three novels in that time period.
Two or three? I’m guessing he’s using the rest of the time for shooting and plotting the downfall of Pinelandia *spits!*
Dammit, Larry, leave Pinelandia alone, and use that time to crank out those other three novels!????????????
Two or three novels in twenty fours, that’s more Ringo in a refrigerator numbers.
AS mentioned above. Have you considered using MeWe instead of FB? FB is cracking down on farmers FB pages for advertising their animals thanks to PETA purchasing enough shares of FB stock that they get to ask questions and influence changes to the sight. Farmers are switching to it and other sites so they can market their animals. I wonder if this might be something for authors who don’t want to get banned when they make fun of an imaginary land and people. Might be something to look into.
Larry is ahead of the zuck.
https://mewe.com/join/monster_hunter_nation
I had a comment pulled for violating standards. The comment was ‘The Akaname, a Japanese filth licking daemon’.
The real joke here, is Facebook. What a crock.
I’m so happy I left Faceplant. I get even happier when I think of all of the brain cells I am saving when I don’t have to parse their reasons for bans. The poor overwhelmed brain cells commit suicide when staring into the face of absurdity.
My account, DrBioCheMiker, was banned from Twitter on Independence Day for “making threats”. I posted the Washington Crossing the Delaware meme. No King George IIIs, Redcoats, or Hessians were harmed by the posting of the meme. I appealed. My account was then permabanned. https://imgur.com/gallery/Nfk36P7
Hey, i got a ban for posting a meme. It’s a cute girl cutting up things for a salad, a guy in the background looking towards her.
He: The dishwasher… It’s acting weird…
She: What’s it doing?
He: Chopping fucking vegetables…
Yeah, it makes zero sense that that was banable. It’s a very silly little joke. :-/
Is it okay to call Pinelandians sheep fuckers on Facebook? Trying to figure out which mammals are not sacred cows.
I’m supposed to be studying, not laughing my damn ass off…..
Zuckerberg is a filthy Pinelandia sympathizer.
I wonder what Facebook will do when they discover that Ranger Up sells “Krasnovia Veteran” t-shirts.
https://rangerup.com/search?type=product&q=krasnovia
The ban is correct. We Pinelandians love our goats and they love us.
We Krasnovians have nothing to do with putting contact fused mines inside Pinelandian Goats. Just good coincidence that blows more pinelandians to mist to fertilize lands.
Hey, I’ve been to Pinelandia and fought in their wars. I’ve seen things, man. The feats they can accomplish with a rake and a cheese slicer are magnificent. It’s the true epitome of the art of war.
Larry insulted a peaceful people of color whose only goal was to enslave more sandwich makers, because their purebred women were impregnated by rabid wildebeest, diluting the race and polluting the sandwiches. Had Larry been sensitive to other cultures, he would perhaps not be so hasty to offend.
OK, I need a nap.
Pinelandians are weird. They close all their shops in the middle of the afternoon for some reason, toilet paper is outlawed, and they don’t sell all-dressed chips in that shithole.
I suspect Facebook of hiring from the bottom of the gene pool. Equal Opportunity Employment and all that jazz, plus they work for less pay.
I’m looking at three options. The ban was effected by either:
a) someone with the geographical knowledge of a handicapped koala and a total lack of differentiation between fact and fiction;
b) an automated algorithm demonstrating why “artificial intelligence” is going to be an oxymoron for at least a few decades to come; or
c) an overzealous pinko using any and all the excuse he could find to try and bully the people he/she/ze dislikes.
Either way, the whole shebang (hebang/zebang) seems to have only managed to further embarrass the company for blowing a gasket over nothing, rather than anyone under the ban. Or, as is the currently trending term for it, they went “Fredo”.
Considering the other report of getting a timeout for using the word “goatf***er”, I’d be willing to bet $50 that it’s your option b), or sort of. I’d bet they have an auto-ban list (not to be confused with the German Autobahn) and “goatf****er” is on that list, because they assume that anyone using that word is talking about Muslims or something.
Just posted a reply and was told “You’ve already said that!” even though it was my first comment on this thread
so far. Weird.
And an extra-special “F—You” to Mark van Name. Were it not for his utter incompetence and stupidity in completely botching the Baen’s Bar software swap back in ’09-’10, none of the Baen authors would have forced to move to a Leftist-run bog like FB in order to get their news reported in the first place, and none of this would have become a problem.
(I should know — *I* was the one who confronted that fathead at the Reno Worldcon in’11, *then* had to report back to the Bar “oh, by the way: Nothing’s happening, and nothing’s likely to happen, and he couldn’t care less”. So you’ll forgive me if I’m a little temperamental on this topic.)
Krasnovians are a joke compared to the Cortina Liberation Front.
Thank you all (especially you, Larry!); I needed a laugh after a rough day…
Am I the only one who thinks there’s a short story, if not a novella, about this Pinelandians and Krasnovians feud?
This is multiple-author anthology material.
We need maps. And a history of both countries.
I think the goat rapists at the Faceless Place were offended.
And all of us Navy types are dying laughing, because both Krasnovia and Pineland are typically orange or white players in Navy war games… And the Army uses Pineland for an area in North Carolina during some of their games.
So … #NotTheBee then?
If not, it needs to be.
Fact check by Snopes I presume.
It’s all those tactical melon ballers the Krasnovians use….
I shall make a sandwich in your honor, sir.
Gawd. imagine if THIS aired today… http://www.cc.com/video-clips/tlwgqa/the-daily-show-with-jon-stewart-cnn-leaves-it-there
I do believe Krasnovians are almost as oppressed and misrepresented by the media as Kekistanis.
Someone needs to ask Joe Biden and AOC about their opinion of the whole Krasnovia/ Pinelandia mess.
Preferably during a live event.
Nah, they’ll just say it’s a “Republican talking point”. It’s the current buzzword of choice for things liberal politicians can’t understand, address, or accept… so, as you can imagine, it’s used quite often.
Oh that would be epic
I’m just curious how many people here have any clue what Pineland, Krasnovia, and Mohavia are.
Of note, I didn’t see the Parumphians make an appearance, either.
And if Krasnovia invaded Pineland, they had a hell of a trip to do it.
So anyone seen the Cookie Monster Reports on the #GenocidewellmostlySandwichWars ?
Hilarious! Almost makes me want to log into FB again so I see these sorts of exchanges when they are posted. Almost…
Someone may have asked this: Can Krasnovian sandwhiches be ordered with Geno on the side?
Wait, wasn’t there an actual (well, notional) planetary invasion being regaled here at some point? It was a role-playing game our host was hosting in meat-space. What happened? I think they got off the planet and then…?
Bad News: War has broken between Krasnovia and Pinleand in the MHI group.
The toaster ovens are impacting left and right. More goats have been killed.
Number of casualties unknown.
One thing to keep in mind about FaceBook is that it is an intelligence collection platform above all else. After that it’s a platform for the owners’ ideologies. Then its an advertising platform. And they even have plans to one day be an exchange for a cryptocurrency they’re creating called Libra.
Notice that one thing that didn’t make that list is “a place to build and maintain social relationships” and that’s because that is not their priority. That just happens to be an outgrowth of their actual priorities.
So I say they’re an intelligence platform because an ideologically driven organization would permanently ban all wrongthink on the spot. Other platforms ban people that the advertisers don’t like. A 24-hour ban means they want Larry back. After all you can’t keep collecting on someone who stops using your software.
One of the ways they do this is through their phone app. It knows where the phone goes and keeps a record of it on their servers. It knows who you sent messages to and who you received them from. Photos you upload contain metadata that includes GPS location where the photo was taken, author’s name, compass heading, and date/time stamps. This is called EXIF data and there are sites and apps out there that let you view the data for yourself.
Where I used to work we’d take this kind of data and use it to track down terrorists. It works for finding people and especially the ones that don’t want to be found. Go to your favorite search engine and type in “facebook government data requests”. Facebook has a page that shows you how often the government asks for data on people. It works. That’s why the number keeps going up.
“So what? I’m a good kid.” you say.
I get that too. But this data doesn’t ever go away. Five, ten years from now the political landscape will be different. FDR 2.0 may be in office and wanting to put more Americans into places named Minidoka, Manzanar, Jerome, and Topaz. If you’ve been happily plugging your personal views and wrongthink into Facebook they now have a handy list of reasons to put you on a watch list as well as all the places you like to frequent and all your friends. All in one convenient database.
So I leave this here as a PSA. I don’t like FB one bit because of this. And the owners’ political leanings make me even more distrustful of them.
Its really generous to call Libra a cryptocurrency.
I just use Instagram.
And they are owned by Facebook
I’m currently on a 7-day ban for a comment made TEN MONTHS AGO that was not even derogatory. The issue was is was made about a protected class, and that cannot happen (according to the book of Zuckerberg).
Tease. What was it?