America's finest

Meet Tony, avid Monster Hunter International fan. This young man, serving in the US Air Force graduates today from NAVSCOLEOD, which is seriously an actual thing, known to most of us cake eating civillians as “Don’t cut the red wire! HUGE EXPLOSION! School”.  Though I have been told that they don’t actually get to cut any wires.

His friend Mike had this to say: “Despite his inability to build a stable mound of sand for his tool, Tony will become an EOD tech. He’s made it through one of the most academically challenging schools in the military.  Today, Tony will prance in front of the EOD Memorial like a proud little Shetland pony and receive his EOD crab.  Congratulations, Tony.  You finally got your standoff right.”

His girlfriend, Kelly added: “Mmhmm that’s my man… You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’m so so so so so so sooooooooooooo proud of you! Like THIS MUCH! I love you babe. Congratulations my Studly Studmuffin! ^^ ”

And that my friends, is the only time ever, in the history of this blog, in which the words “Studly Studmuffin” have or will be uttered.

On behalf of the Monster Hunter Nation, congratulations Tony, and thank you for your service.

Tanya, Princess of the Elves
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19 thoughts on “America's finest”

  1. Thank you Tony for your service. EOD tech? WOW! Seriously man, that takes some cajones.

    I salute you.

    1. Are you kidding, I was on the opposite side of a hand fired missile, (sitting right next to my head) when ours said, “Oh CRAP!”
      I figured I was going to be ok as he was then silent for a few seconds , till he followed it up with, “Um, Dude, RUN!”

      I am man enough to admit that I wet myself just a bit, as I was breaking the land speed record.

  2. Congrats to the young man – I still remember my time at Eglin well, and am now proud to wear a civilian crab every day as a police bomb tech. He has accomplished something few even dare to try, and it will stay with him for life.

  3. you knew this was coming right?

    “Studly Studmuffin”
    “Studly Studmuffin”
    “Studly Studmuffin”
    “Studly Studmuffin”
    “Studly Studmuffin”
    “Studly Studmuffin”

    Yes i am a jackass 😀

  4. Dagamore, yes you are. But are you a “Studly Studmuffin” jackass?

    The sad part is, now if we are commenting on some serious post about healthcare or other general commieness, I’m going to want to do something like,

    “…And in conclusion, you can see that Harry Reid and Barry are, indeed, no Studly Studmiffins on this issue…”

    or perhaps…

    “…And when McCain countered Reid’s arguments, he almost looked like the studly studmuffin maverick he claims to be…”

    And Congrats to the young man. We’ll all pray that all the *BOOMs* happen when he’s back behind cover.

  5. As an EOD tech, you now get to celebrate the most rare and wonderful of all holidays in the military, September 30th!
    Yes that grand and glorious day each year when the EOD guys get to blow up all the unspent training munitions that had been allocated for the ending fiscal year.
    God I loved that day. Mushroom clouds every year. I’m getting tingles just thinking about it

  6. So the real question is, how long will it take Larry to become the #1 site for the search term “Studly Studmuffin?” *ducks*

  7. That’ll teach him to graduate two weeks before me. Two whole weeks I have to suffer him lording his crab over me.

  8. Wow, good thing I didn’t go EOD… any kind of crab absolutely freaks me out like Harbinger seeing Byreika’s diary.


    Ten EOD Techs from all services, including three from the Air Force, have been killed in action since Tony and I have been in school.

    I know it sounds cheesy, but go find a veteran and buy him lunch. Or at least say thank you. It might be a little awkward for him/her, but it’s always appreciated.

  10. Looks like you made it through NAVY EOD- tough school. Congrats and best wishes for a LONG and successful career (also known as DON’T cut the red wire…)

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