How to get Correia nominated for a Hugo PART 2: A VERY SPECIAL MESSAGE

sad puppy

As promised, I will continue to bug you guys about this until the end of the month. If you are not aware of my life-quest to make literati critics spontaneously combust, please read this first:

http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2013/01/08/how-to-get-correia-nominated-for-a-hugo/

You know that Sarah McLachlan commercial on TV where they play the sad song and show injured puppies and dying kitties and it totally screws up your whole day? Yeah… Please play this song as you read the following VERY SPECIAL MESSAGE.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nSz16ngdsG0

Every year thousands of pulp writers slave away in the word mines for as little as five cents a word…

(show picture of very sad looking author, sitting in bathrobe, listlessly typing, surrounded by empty cans of Coke Zero and cheesy puff wrappers)

Yet, despite providing hours of explosion filled enjoyment to their readers, most pulp novelists will never be recognized by critics, and in fact, they will be abused by the literati elite.

(show extra sad looking pulp novelist, more than likely an overweight guy with a beard)

Literary critics stuffed this pulp novelist into a dryer, and ran at high temperatures for nearly five minutes without even a sheet of fabric softener.

For generations literary critics and college English departments have looked down at pulp novelists and refused to give them awards…

(show old-timey picture of HP Lovecraft, show old-timey picture of Robert E. Howard, show old-timey picture of Robert E. Howard punching out a Tyrannosaurs Rex  while a woman in a chainmail bikini holds onto his leg)

Even though those guys are totally freaking awesome, and Conan the Barbarian is a thousand times more awesome than the Great Gatsby, you wouldn’t know it by listening to literary snobs.

The hoighty-toighty literati snobs prefer heavy handed, ham fisted, message fiction.

(show picture of sci-fi readers giving up in frustration as they read yet another award winning book where evil corporations, right wing religious fanatics, and a thinly veiled Dick Cheney have raped the Earth until all the polar bears have died and the plot consists entirely of academic hipster douchebags sitting around and talking about their feelings)  

Much like Michael Vick, literary critics hate pulp novelists and make them fight in vicious underground novelist fighting arenas. I actually did pretty good, until Dan Wells made a shiv from a sharpened spoon and got me in the kidney. Never turn your back on the guy that writes about serial killers, I tell you what.

Only you can stop literary snobs and their abuse of pulp novelists…

For as little as $60 you can become a voting member of WorldCon and nominate something awesome and filled with dragons, explosions, guns, heroism, actual good and evil, and a plot where stuff actually happens. And unlike Sarah McLachlan’s sad puppy commercial, your donation also gets you a whole big ton of free eBooks and all of the nominated works, worth more than the cost of joining.

Details: http://www.lonestarcon3.org/hugo-awards/index.shtml

Application: http://www.lonestarcon3.org/paypal_test/display_entry_new.php

And once you’ve done that, you can nominate. The nominations stay open for a few more months, so I’ll post about some of the things I think which are awesome, but which normally don’t have a snowball’s chance in hell of winning.  This includes a bunch of different categories, and you’d get your say and nominate up to five of your favorite things for each!  http://www.lonestarcon3.org/hugo-awards/hugo-nom.html

So please tell your friends. I will continue to bug you about this for the rest of the month. Do not make me play the sad puppy song again…

 

32 Responses

  1. Man, you went nuclear early.

  2. I got your sad puppy right here…

  3. Got my membership and one for my wife last night. Two votes headed your way. Hope to see you in San Antonio!

    • Does the “voter packet” actually contain the full works or just snippets. Not that I’d vote for the other guys but I’m addicted to reading and many books for $60.00 would fix my jonsing for some time.

      … hey hey man all I need is a quick fix a well written query or a sample chapter you know anything man… don’t leave a guy hanging I need the good stuff I’ll do anything “anything”…
      ^ me having imaginary conversation with authors after I finish their latest book and then have to wait 12+ months until my next fix.

      • I can’t speak for them, but in the past it has been complete works. So all the Hugo novels, the Campbell novels, novellas, novelletes, and short stories, and then the supporting works usually include podcasts and graphic novels.

      • Then just like the kickstarter for your RPG I only await my latest paycheck.

  4. Okay, I’m sold. I’ll buy a supporting membership and vote for Larry Corriea. But we need a video of critics heads exploding. And maybe John Scalzi’s, too.

  5. D’awwwww! The sap puppy picture sold me. I’m going to have to spend $60 to make the sad puppy happy. However, I’m also going to insist you put a literati’s head exploding into one of your future books.

  6. So I’m feeling kind of dim-witted right now. If I sign up for this I can still nominate and get free e-booky scifi goodness even if I can’t go to Texas? Or is actual attendance required?

    • You don’t need to go to Texas to nominate or vote. If you decide you want to attend later, you can upgrade your supporting membership to a full one if you feel like it.

      • Ah, good to know. Thanks. (Looks furtively at wallet, contemplates smaller paycheck thanks to payroll tax increase, ponders…)

  7. Puppy dog eyes? I’m sorry Larry, but you’ve gone too far. Tugging on our heartstrings like a liberal purely for advancement of your own agenda? What has MHN come to??

    Next thing we know, you’ll be posting pictures of kittez and recruiting bronies.

  8. You need to show the pulp writers wandering around a third world, oops, a developing nation trash heap looking for white out or pencil nubs while Sally Stuthers weeps.

  9. you know Larry, we could have actually shot this….

  10. *snort* Yeah, yeah… Already joined, Larry. Don’t knock message sci-fi too hard – mine has homicidal slasher Amazons *too*. :c)

  11. [...] a very special message from Larry Correia that I have to [...]

  12. Or…
    “This is Philip K. Dick, an impoverished pulp writer…”

    (Shot of PKD looking impoverished)

    “In order to feed his family he had to take amphetamines to write faster.”

    (Shot of PKD downing a handful of uppers and typing maniacally)

    “But tragically, the drugs broke his brain to the point where 3 eyed Soviet angels were shooting knowledge lasers into his head…”

    (Shot of VALiS book cover)

    (stern voice)”Don’t let this happen to Larry Correia! Join today! Unless YOU want MHI to also turn into incomprehensible ramblings on the nature of reality.”

  13. I was up for a Hugo once. I bet if I’d been a transexual named Bradley Jane Torgersen, I’d have won, too. But wait, lest anyone think I shed bitter tears, I must inform the group that the Hugo and the Nebula are not cash prizes. In fact, you the nominee must pay them for the privilege, by being in their clubs. Memberships. Exclusivity. That’s the nature of the beast. I had a lot of fun being on the ballots. I would happily trade each and every award nomination I’ve ever gotten for just one of Larry Correia’s Baen contracts. You see, hiding under this polished, urbane veneer, beats the heart of a pulp writer. Bring me my cavewoman in bearskin bikini! Larry makes more money in one book than many Hugo winners will make in their entire careers. Larry Correia is dead. Long live Larry Correia!

  14. Just joined Worldcon so I can nominate and vote. You have some dedicated fans. I’m thinking this’ll be a landslide.

  15. Some pertinent info for people who want to vote from one of the links:

    The nomination period for the 2013 Hugo Awards and John W. Campbell Award is now under way. All ballots must be received by Sunday, March 10, 2013, 11:59 p.m. EDT (Sunday, March 10, 2013, 8:59 p.m. PDT; Monday, March 11, 2013, 6:59 a.m. UTC/GMT).

    Nomination is open to anyone who has a Supporting or Attending membership in the previous, current, or following year’s Worldcon as of January 31. For LoneStarCon 3, this means members of Chicon 7 (the 2012 Worldcon), LoneStarCon 3 itself, and Loncon 3 (the 2014 Worldcon).

    ———–

    So if you’re going to do it, then do it soon. ;)

  16. So, for those of you who have recently signed up with Worldcon, did you get your PIN yet? I paid this morning, but I haven’t gotten a confirmation from them or anything. I’m guessing they’re processing this stuff manually?

    • I had to ask for it via email, but it came promptly afterwards.

      So, besides Monster Hunter Legion, is there anything else I could nominate to make SciFi critics’ brains explode?

    • Still waiting on mine too. I probably should email them. Kind of sucks that they don’t have a better registration system. I hate using paypal.

  17. In regards to your works’ fitness as literature, I found the following from an interview with Tolkien. Makes very interesting reading . . .

    “[Tolkien] finds it surprising and pleasing that The Lord of the Rings has had such a success. It seems to him that nowadays almost any kind of fiction is mishandled, though not being sufficiently enjoyed. He thinks that there is now a tendency both to believe and teach that “enjoyment” is an illiterate reaction; that if you are a serious reader, you should take the construction to pieces; find and analyze sources, dissect it into symbols, and debase it into allegory. Any idea of actually reading the book for fun is lost.

    ‘It seems to me comparable to a man who having eaten anything, from a salad to a complete and well-planned dinner, uses an emetic, and sends the results for chemical analysis.’”

    – From a 1964 interview of Tolkien by Daphne Castell, published as The Realms of Tolkien, in New Worlds, an Anthology, edited by Michael Moorcock, Thunder’s Mouth Press, 2004, ISBN 1-56858-317-6, pp. 308 & 309.

    Larry, it seems that in the area of literary opinion, you are in exceedingly good company.

    —- Ray.

  18. I have my Hugo PIN and am not afraid to use it. Awaiting further instructions………

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