Because conquistadors get the longest killing streaks and unlock mad perks.
Am I related to Gaspar Correia? I don’t actually know. However, he was a historian who made up wild crap about monsters and mystical adventures because writing about actual real stuff was lame. So if we are related at least I know where I get it from.
Vasco – Hey, Correia. What’s on the other side of those mountains? I don’t think the Portuguese have ever gone there. Correia – Oh, those mountains? That’s where there are dragon mummies that are ridden by ninjas who fight gladiatorial battles in an arena made of solid gold. Vasco – Oh. Groovy. Hey, let’s go pillage the **** out of that village.
Because my ancestors simply did not give a crap. Outnumbered 8,000 to 1? Well, that means we might be late for dinner.
Filed under: Uncategorized