SLCNerd this Saturday

http://m.sltrib.com/sltrib/mobile/53750155-81/nerds-geeks-event-saturday.html.csp

Unleashing the Power of the Internet to get Mike Kupari a Job.

As many of you know, Mike Kupari is my co-author on the Dead Six series, and just got back from a deployment to Afghanistan. He’s got another month of active duty, and then he’ll just be in the guard.

Which means that now Mike needs a job.

I was eating lunch with him today and this topic came up. He’s been looking, but hasn’t had any luck yet. He’s got a lot of really cool skills, but there are only so many times a day when a local business needs to defuse an improvised bomb.  So I offered to use my blog to help him shake the trees.

So if you know of any job openings at your workplace, please post in the comments. Mike will be reading them and will respond to you directly.

Now let me tell you about Mike. If you look at his resume, he’s done military (Army Engineer), military contracting (in Qatar), security guarding, and then back to the military (Air Force EOD). However he really doesn’t want to go back to being a security guard. He’s got 3 years of college, but didn’t finish because he went off to do the contracting thing.

He worked for me back when I was in the gun business, and I can say with all honesty that he is a really good salesman. He’s excellent with people and far more patient than I am. I used Mike as one of my assistant instructors any time I could, just because he was so good at dealing with people and excellent and training and answering questions. He’s got excellent written communications skills. Heck, the dude’s written a book good enough to get picked up by a national publishing house.

Mike is currently a Staff Sergeant in the Air Force. He’s an Explosive Ordnance Disposal Technician, which means the robot-driving, bomb-suit-wearing, balls-of-steel, go down and mess around with the murder-bombs guys. Like I said, this is not a skill set that sees a whole lot of use in the civilian world. But think of it this way, when you ask during the interview about how the candidate deals with stressful situations, Mike’s definition of what constitutes stressful will be a bit more refined than the other candidates. “Oh, no. I got the TPS reports filed in the wrong order! The boss will be upset!” vs. “If I don’t play this game of high speed death chess against the Taliban exactly right, then they’ll have to scrape up my remains with a spatula.”

I am one of his references. Personally, I would trust Mike with my life. He’s like an uncle to my kids.

So if you know of anybody looking to hire right now, and you want a smart guy, who is good with people, and can handle pressure, do me a favor and post in the comments.

EDIT: Forgot to add, Mike currently lives in Utah near Hill AFB.

Joe Biden, the gift that keeps on giving

http://pjmedia.com/tatler/2012/03/19/biden-in-500-years-there-was-never-so-audacious-a-military-op-as-osama-nab/ 

Speaking about Obama’s decision to send the SEALs to get Osama: “You can go back 500 years. You cannot find a more audacious plan,”

Yes… That was certainly the most audacious military move in five hundred years, if not EVAR!

Like many history buffs, I am a little confused by this statement. So I sat down with Vice President Joe “Joe” Biden to ask his opinions on matters of military history.

***

LC – You said that Barack Obama made the most audacious military move in five hundred years. What about D Day? You’d think the biggest, craziest, most secret invasion ever would be audacious.

JB -Nope. Bunch of chumps sunning themselves on a beach.

LC – Manhattan Project war ending super weapon?

JB -Nerds and their slide rules.

LC – What about the turning point of Midway, or the Japanese surprise attack that destroyed our Pacific fleet?

JB -Barack Obama plays with cooler boats in the bath tub!

LC – Ok, Joe. What about during the Korean War when a handful of frostbitten Marines fought off a million Chinese?

JB -Barack Obama’s played golf games that were tougher.

LC – Lost Brigade?

JB -Barack Obama never gets lost! The Secret Service has GPS. 

LC – Seriously? What about facing certain death and answering Nuts?

JB – I don’t even know what that means, but Barack Obama loves him some cashews! 

LC – Maybe I’m not thinking big enough. That’s only this century. You said five centuries. What about the Alamo?

JB – I don’t drink imported beer.

LC – George Washington versus the best army in the world?

JB -Who?

LC – You know. Founding Father. War of Independance… The Constitution?

JB – I’m not familiar with this “constitution” thingy, but whoever he was he was a punk ass bitch compared to Barack Obama! 

LC – You know, five hundred years is really a long time, and there were some fairly audacious military folks making some fairly audacious decisions during that. Napoleon, Robert E. Lee, Lord Nelson,  Shaka Zulu, Geronimo… Hell, Hernando Cortez and Oda Nobunaga squeek into that timeframe… These aren’t ringing any bells are they?  

JB- Sorry, I was getting another beer from that convenience store down on the corner. It’s owned by an Indian. Not that kind of Indian. The other kind. Like all the taxi drivers. With the dot on their forehead. Not the kind with feathers.

LC – I swear, you’re like a circus clown trapped in a vice president’s body. You’re like assassination insurance. May God have mercy on us all.

***

Well there you go, folks. Everything, in history, ever, for all time, pales next to finding out that the most wanted man in the world is in a house in Pakistan and sending a group of Navy SEALs to kill his ass, even after you blithered on about it, almost didn’t do it because you were afraid of hurting feelings, and got manipulated into it by Leon Panetta and Hillary Clinton.  

Joe’s latest brings back memories of such classics as this one:  http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2011/05/26/joe-biden-and-bud-light-presents-teh-bestest-president-evar/ It almost makes you wish for the good old days, like when the media destroyed a vice president for spelling potato wrong. Oh wait, that was a republican. Never mind.

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