I accept Nickwolf’s challenge to debate

I figured after the rambling ‘debate or die treason tea-bag blah blah blah’ I’d publically accept Nickwolf’s challenge. Here is the e-mail that I sent to him:

Dear Nickwolf,

I didn’t think it was possible, but the more you type, the dumber you get. Your ignorance of history is only rivaled by your sad inability to communicate in any meaningful way. You say that you’d like to debate, and normally I’d welcome the chance, but I think I’d rather debate an enraged poo-flinging howler monkey. But regardless, I accept your offer to debate at any time. My blog receives about 2,000 hits a day, so that’s a pretty good audience for you to try to reach with your ‘message’.

They especially enjoyed your last… I don’t know what word to call it. Ranting usually indicates some sort of coherent subject matter… unhinged rambling perhaps?

http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/2010/09/15/nickwolf-returns-again-with-special-commentary-by-larry-correia/

Everyone had a good laugh at your expense and once again you embarrassed and damaged your own side. A good time was had by all. I’ve got moderate and even liberal readers, so it isn’t just my side that thinks you’re insane. In fact, the liberals are praying for you to shut up and quit making them look bad. Personally, I hope you keep posting in public, because you’ve done far more to help the Tea Party movement with your idiotic blatherings than anything I could ever hope to accomplish. The undecided look at your writings and say “I’m on whatever side that douchebag’s not.”

Have a good one. Try not to have a complete come-apart when the “clear majority” tells your side to go get ****ed in November. :) 

Treasonously yours,

 

-Larry

p.s. If you paid money for that membership to the Guild of Writers or whatever it is, you really should try to get a refund. Personally, as a professional and commercially successful writer, I think that basic literacy should be a prerequisite to membership to any ‘writer’s’ guild. But I’m old fashioned like that.

p.p.s. I hope your grandma is well. You really shouldn’t be so hard on her. I know you are bitter about all that in-breeding but it really isn’t her fault you were born with flipper toes. They just didn’t know as much about genetics back then.  

I am eagerly awaiting his response. I thought by my standards that was pretty darn polite.

24 Responses

  1. Larry that’s just………. wow. ;-)

    I hope he comes back it’s just too much fun. It’s like watching a slow moving train wreck. You can’t help but watch, or in this case read.

    Off topic: Do you know when those signed copies of MHV will be shipping? Thanks.

  2. Whew. I have to say that was an especially scathing challenge, especially the bit about in-breeding :P

  3. I was going to say something about how it’s not nice to insult peoples’ grandmother’s but then I realized that something had to be hinky back in the past to get Nickwolf where he is today, and she is partly to blame for that.

  4. We’re going to have to send some one over to clean the spittle off his computer screen before he can respond. 1… 2… 3… not it!

    I can’t wait to see his next installment.

  5. If only they had read Time Enough for Love back when his grandparents were thinking about kids… Although they might have skipped the whole genetic stock and breeding portion and skipped right to everyone sleeping together.

  6. Well, considering the full layering of rude and incoherent exposition on Nickwolf’s part, I think your letter was pretty cordial. The anonymity of the internet always gets all the “tough guys” out there screaming at everyone. It would be interesting to see him actually debate you at a physical location. It would be funnier that way. =)

    What’s this about autographed copies? I just started reading here, so I must have missed it…?

  7. i’d still like to know what nickwolf does for a living, or if he’s on wellfare… … …

    (i’m not making fun of nickwolf, the 3 x 3 elipsies is just my thing, i do it everwhere i post online) … … …

  8. Will popcorn be served at the poo-fling, er, debate? It would be best to remove all sharp objects beforehand.

    Just sayin…

  9. Oh, I can’t wait. You could charge admission to this. I offer my services as a debate moderator, though I cannot promise not to verbally b!tch slap Nickwolf if he takes a tangent out to Ersa Minor.

  10. Dude. Flippertoes? Almost fell off the throne on that one!

  11. I’m just plain speechless. Larry, you raised the bar to new levels of awesome with that invitation. I am so looking forward to reading his reaction (or his obituary mentioning foam at the mouth and an exploded head).

  12. This is like watching a painful comedy starring Ben Stiller…with Will Farrel cameos and Adam McKay directing.

  13. I can’t wait to see how this turns out. Of course, it will probably be a few months before Nickwolf can gather his “thoughts” enough to reply…

    By the way, I love the “Treasonously Yours” thing. Brilliant.

  14. Classy. :D

  15. I see you shiver with antici……………..pation!

  16. Can someone introduce him to the computer game Counterstrike, and let him shoot an HK once?

    Then give him a list of shooter’s forums?

    • Kristopher, you *really* want to give a firearm to someone who can’t string 2 sentences together without 3 typo’s and 7 periods? Nerf guns are too powerful for him!

      • I want someone else to give him a gun with a single round in the chamber.

        Preferably while I’m in a different state.

  17. pure gold larry…

  18. I think Nickwolf may also be “Mick” over on Volokh Conspiracy and jonathanturley.org The crazy smells the same.

    FRAUD!

  19. Larry,

    Out of curiousity, I followed your links back to Nickwolf’s original posting (with your comments). Now that I have cleaned off my laptop’s screen and keyboard from the nasally ejected martini I was enjoying having just gotten home from a long (12 hour) shift at the PD (BTW gin and vermouth really burns the old nasal cavities on the way out), I can muster a comment on the Nickwolf saga (thank goodness the keyboard was not disabled by the dousing). Now Ole Nick’s one funny dude, especially when accompanied by editorial comment.

    C’mon admit it, you (being the clever writer that we know you to be) made up the whole Nickwolf posting right? I mean, I know there are some true leftwing nutjobs out there, as I seem to have to deal with at least a couple a day at work (hence the after work martini with my blog surfing), but Nickwolf is a true prize.

    If indeed he is real, how fortunate that he stumbled across your blog, of all the rightwing gun toters out there on the web. Your ability to conduct a good “Fisking” interspersed in just the right places within a rant like Nickwolf’s has been demonstrated to be on par with the best of them (to our great delight).

    Now, as a cop, I don’t have a lot of “descretionary spending money”, but if you could put together an actual live debate at some location, I would pay to get there and see that, as would a very large number of your readers, I’m sure.

    Of course if Nickwolf were to get a little too far out of hand, I can see an audience reaction like the bar patrons in the botched armed robbery in the Chuck Norris movie “Code of Silence” (for those who haven’t seen it, the patrons were all cops, I’m sure you can picture it from there).

    • I had a couple of people ask me at a book signing if NIckwolf was actually made up. If he is, it isn’t by me. I’m not THAT good of a writer. :D

  20. Hey Larry. I’ve been getting e-mails from someone that might be related to Nickwolf. really off the wall, tin foil hat, conspiracy stuff. maybe we should introduce them to each other.

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