Megan Fox sucks and hates you

http://www.worstpreviews.com/headline.php?id=13818 

“TotalFilm recently interviewed the actress and asked her how she would stop the villainous Megatron from demolishing the planet. Fox first said that she would “make a deal with him,” adding: “and instead of the entire planet, can you just take out all of the white trash, hillbilly, anti-gay, super bible-beating people in Middle America?”

I guess Fox is not too worried about losing acting gigs due to her comments. She previously stated that she will keep getting cast in movies and doesn’t need to be a good actress, because Hollywood is superficial and she happens to be good-looking.”

Wow. All I can say is, girl, save your money. Invest wisely, because nobody is ever going to hire you for your brains or your talent, and that body will only last so long.

I’ll admit, I enjoyed the first Transformers. Giant Robots Fight, enough said. Then I watched it again recently with my son for his birthday on DVD. I realized that like most Michael Bay big explosion movies, the human interaction in between the action scenes are rather painful.  Really, how many of us have this on DVD, and don’t skip most of the scenes? Hmm… humans, humans, humans, ahh giant robots! Play!

For example, listen to the dialog of the soldiers in the opening bit aboard the V22 Osprey. Hey, let’s throw some stereotypes together! “I can’t wait to get back to Fenway and eat a hotdog. Not me, I’m the handsome white guy, and I so dearly miss my baby. Whoo Wee I gots to eat me some aligator! Yee Haw!” 

Then you’ve got the whole asinine family interactions, and scenes that go on far too long. Look, we don’t care. Make the giant robots fight.  I don’t care about your stupid dog. I don’t care about your homework. I don’t care that Shia is a horny teenager. Whatever. Make the giant robots FIGHT already!

Then you’ve got the Anthony Anderson character… because remember, it is us despised middle-Americans that are racist. Not Hollywood… They’d never perpetuate a negative stereotype… “Grandma don’t like no PO-Leese in the house! I done ate up all them doughnuts ’cause now they know I ain’t guilty!” Then he immediatly betrays his friend. “Ooooh, I done ate me too many of dem doughnuts!”   

And back to our brain-surgeon, Megan Fox? She was the worst.  Many people liked Megan Fox in the first move as eye candy, despite the fact that she can’t act, and her delivery is so wooden that it made the 1980s Transformer’s cartoons look like Masterpiece Theater. Yes, she is hot, in a sleazy, Kid Rock video kind of way. I find it ironic that she’s bashing us middle-Americans as white trash hillbillys, when she looks strangely like the meth-fried village-bicycles I saw in various Alabama trailer parks. Look, if I wanted to watch a no-talent hack who was just easy on the eyes, I’d rent porn, and then I wouldn’t have to suffer through her trying to string coherant sentances together either.  

I did like the heroic Donald Rumsfeld character, you got me there.

So now we’ve got Transformers 2. I’ll skip the theater, just because now that I’m aware of how much the dialog is going to drag, and the newness of the giant robots is gone. I’ll just watch it on DVD so I can skip the insipid humans, and the dreck that passes for story, and go right to Optimus Prime hitting things.  And I’ll make sure I borrow the DVD or get a bootleg, because sorry, Megan, you dimwit, you aren’t getting a dime of my white-trash hillybilly bible-thumping money.

15 Responses

  1. One thing I found entertaining was the knock offs that appeared in Hollywood video when Transformers was in the theater, namely TransMorphers and Transmogrifiers. I never had the courage to rent one, it was enough just look at the case and laugh.

  2. She strikes me as another one of those Hollywood “stars” that aren’t anything close to being a star. All to many of them do not have the class to keep their mouths shut and personal problems out of the public eye. Like you, I think she needs acting lessons. Until her actual acting improves, she will be nothing but a mobile pinup in any movie she is in.

    • Whatever happened to Class? Old Hollywood for all their hidden stories at least had some sort of dignity to it. I was just thinking about this today. The old Stars were not into this shocking and/or militant-political crap and at least they tried to portray a shred of decency with their lives in public.
      The old Hollywood starlet has become the Hollywood Slut.

  3. meth-fried village-bicycles

    I actually laughed out loud at that one. Well played, sir!

  4. Who’d a thought Megan Fox & HK had anything in common? Oh wait HK is because you & we hate you.

  5. wait wait, you mean she acted that the first movie. I don’t think she was in the move for any other reason than to look at.
    you know watch robot blow stuff up, cut to Fox in a tight top, cut to robots fighting, cut to Fox in a short skirt,,, etc etc.
    You know an actors job it to entertain and the only way she can do that is by being eye candy.

  6. Enh. I just got back. It’s pretty awesome on a big screen.

    Optimus Prime, hitting things, at 1:1 scale. :D

  7. [...] It seems that people who like these movies pretty much only want to see the combined eye-candy of CG-rendered giant robots fighting and Megan Fox strutting her stuff. I think that’s pretty funny, as I don’t think that [...]

  8. I dunno. I don’t really care what those people think ;) And after seeing the reports, I guess I’ll hafta get transformers. Looked dumb to me.

    Not to start off on a new topic, but it bothers me less what she said than “The man who’s leading us” when he said basically the same thing.

    Decent looking woman, but there are others just as good, but with better quality ;-)

  9. Well, she’s got Hollywood’s act down pat, I’ll give her that much.

  10. There’s a scene where she changes from biker leather to a low-cut short minidress. AND there’s scenes of unspeakable robot devastation… Good movie. I forgive her idiocy because nobody is paying attention to her talking.

  11. I dunno, I find her honesty (for a Hollywood starlet) to be refreshing. I don’t necessarily agree with her, but I’m glad someone in that town has a real opinion for once

  12. she eats ass and asks for seconds//

  13. I couldn’t stand Megan Fox even before she said this.
    For one, she can’t act at all. Her job in the Transformer movies is to stand there and look good.
    Now with that said what really bothers me is how everyone is brainwashed into thinking she’s so hot, Really? I could go to my local mall and see a dozen better looking women than Megan Fox.
    In her interviews she acts like a crazy slut, and the crew from the second transformers pretty much called her a bitch.
    Not to mention how much these transformer movies suck. Especially the second one.

  14. Freeking skanky ho, The only thing that makes her look good is all that makeup, If i wanna look at a Coyote i’ll just go out into the woods. ,,!,, Megan you suck…

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