Star Trek & Wolverine

So I finally had some time this last week and managed to go to the movies. I caught Wolverine on Friday and Star Trek last night.

There will be spoilers. You have been warned. But then again, as usual, I’m about the last person to see things in the movies, so you already know all this.

As much as this pains me to say, because I’ve never been a Trekkie, but I’ve been reading Marvel Comics since I could read, Star Trek wins hands down. The critics are right, Star Trek is that good.  Wolverine? I’ll watch it again on DVD for the fight scenes.

Now for both movies, check your brain at the door and enjoy them for what they are. I watched Star Trek with somebody who is basically an industrial scientist. Cut him and he bleeds science. This is the kind of person that on demand can give you a dissertation about sonic wave functions and harmonic stabilization in miliamps or something that my feeble accountant brain can’t comprehend. (basically if I ever attempt to write actual hard sci-fi, Mark is my technical advisor) Even he liked it, and he’s not a Trekkie either, and he did have a few comments about using explosions to drive your way out of a black hole. (“good luck with that!”)

Star Trek had great characters. Having never been in love with original Trek, I’m not a purist, and I’m not offended by changes to cannon. I just want a good story. These characters gave me that. I thought that Syler from Heroes was absolutely perfect as Spock, and not only that, he was like young, kinda angry Spock.

Kirk was not William Shatner. As much as I love William Shatner for his sheer audacity of being William Shatner, New Kirk was much more watchable.

The other characters were immediately recognizable as who they should be. I’m glad to see Karl Urban as McCoy, because I like Karl Urban in everything. What was the best thing about the otherwise boring 2nd Jason Bourne movie? The scary Russian, Karl Urban. He’s been an Indian-Viking and has fought the Rock. That’s a resume. Perfect.

I had some nitpicks on some of the tactics of Starfleet. “Hey, it is our only chance to save the world! Let’s beam in TWO guys with handguns onto the enemy ship!” Even if you don’t have space marines, wouldn’t you beam over every cadet you could until you ran out of phasers, and then equip the remainder with gardening implements and send them over too? 

My friend asked why they didn’t beam over a photon torpedo while they were at it, but that would have blown up the red matter. Ha! I got that one. They should have just had Scotty say some Hand-Wavium about how dylithium levels would only let them beam two people onto the Romulan ship or something, and I would have been happy.

Overall, Star Trek rocked. I will watch this one again, and I’m actually hoping for more movies. My huge Trekkie buddy will probably give me crap now, but it is true. You win, Marcus. It is that awesome.

X-Men: Origins: Wolverine: The Sharpening: was good, but just good. Don’t get me wrong, it was about 1000% better than X-Men III: The Crapening.

My only pet-peeve, and this will show off my nerdish fanboy-ness is that they went non-cannon on Dead Pool. (my gosh, I’m pathetic). DP is my favorite Marvel Comics character. (well, reading the Punisher made me the man I am today, so I guess Frank still wins). How could you not like a disfigured, crazy guy, who is literally in love with Death, can’t die, and is aware that he is a comic book character and actually talks to the audience?  Ryan Reynolds was actually perfect casting, as he’s got great deadpan comic delivery. (I loved Waiting, and that is why I’m always super nice to anybody that prepares my food) When I heard about that casting, I got my hopes up for a future super hero movie that would be way outside the norm.

Then he turns into a mouthless zombie with katana arms and laser eyeballs and Wolverine cuts his head off. The end.

(on a purely technical note, how was he supposed to bend his elbows with the swords shoved up in there? They were probably going to remedy that in Weapon XII.)

Now, I do know how we fanboys can still get our movie. Dead Pool had his head cut off and grows a new one. Lose the katana arms and the laser beam eyes, and you’ve got a movie.  He’s had his head cut off before, no biggie.

If you want to watch something to see why I think a DP movie would be awesome, watch Hulk vs. Wolverine. There are all sorts of lines in there that are laugh out loud funny. “Logan! I think we lost him!” “I thought his last words would have been ‘Oh Sabertooth No!” “Babies creep me out, man.” and so on and so forth.

Yes, it is pathetic how much of a nerd I am. I actually read every issue of Alpha Flight for like four years. Regular super mutants weren’t enough, so I turned to CANADIAN super mutants!  That’s sad.

I don’t know why I didn’t like Origins: Wolverine very much. It hasn’t really gelled as to what the movie was missing. It just wasn’t interesting enough to really keep thinking about, and maybe that’s the issue.

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