Movie Review: Black Sheep

Black Sheep is set New Zealand, and is a serious, cautionary tale about the dangers of tampering with nature.  It is thoughtful, timeless, and is a wonderful film for people of all ages.


Nah…  It is a movie about killer sheep.  Seriously.  Killer Sheep.  Genetically mutated, flesh-hungry, pack-hunting, freaks of nature.  But now you have to ask yourself, how friggin’ awesome is that?   If you answer pretty awesome, you should see it.  If you say that sounds stupid, then don’t watch it, because then I don’t want to listen to you complain later, because the movie is about killer sheep, so you can’t honestly say that we didn’t tell you so.


Now personally, I thought Black Sheep was great.  I won’t waste your time telling you about the plot, because fundamentally there isn’t a real big one.  Greedy farmer does genetic experimentation to build a super breed of sheep, environmentalist morons (I know, that’s a stretch) accidentally free a botched mutant, botched mutant spreads the mutation to all the other sheep, fun ensues, and weresheep.  Yes, you read that correctly, Weresheep.  My spell checker doesn’t even know what to make about that word. 


I watched this last night, and I laughed out loud a bunch.  I’ve dealt with sheep when I was a kid back on the farm, so watching the dumb little grass-maggots get blown up, shot, or run over was fine by me.  Sheep are just so… puffy.  So having them turn into insane killing machines was just great.


I went over to IMDB to get the link for this movie, and while I was there I read the reviews.  Man, people are just dumb.  Some people watched it, and then complained because the movie was cheesy and unrealistic.  Dude, you rented a movie about killer sheep… What the hell did you expect?

 Idiot (thinking to himself while wandering listlessly through Blockbuster):  I’m going to rent a movie.  This one says it is about killer sheep.  I fully expect this movie to be filled with biting social commentary, Woody Allen style humor, high production values, and perhaps a serious discussion of global warming and how George Bush is bad.  I haven’t seen the review in the New Yorker yet, but I’m certain that since it is about killer sheep, it will be winning several Oscars.  Hmm… it is either this or that latest Robert Redford movie about how America sucks.  I’ll go with the killer sheep.

Idiot (posting a review on IMDB after the shocking revelation that the killer sheep movie is actually about killer sheep):  This movie sucks and is lame!  Save your money! There is fart humor and references to people having sex with our animal companions.   Boo! 

So if you have realistic expectations, you should see this flick.  If you love monster movies, see this immediately.  It is good, cheesy, fun in the same vein as Bad Taste and Dead Alive, thank you again New Zealand.


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