Happy Halloween!

I love this time of year.  Halloween is my favorite holiday.  Sure, other holidays are fun and all, but Halloween is the best.  You can dress like an idiot, eat absurd amounts of sugar, and it is the one time of the year where everybody else has to respect my taste in movies. 

 

I’ve never been an imaginative type when it comes to costumes.  This year I wore a toga bottom, no shirt, a sword, and a big red cape.  I was a Spartan.  See, when you’re an enormous, hairy man, being shirtless in public is automatically funny.  When I went to the FBMG Halloween party, I walked in, screamed “This is not madness!  THIS IS UTAH!” and kicked one of the other guests in the chest.  It really made me want to have a bottomless pit installed in the gun store. 

 

And no, there are no pictures.  I had them destroyed in case I ever decide to run for office.  We did get pictures of the best costume, which was a full on Bender from Futurama suit worn by Nick the Intern.  I’ll have to get copies of that to post.  It was pretty sweet. 

 

I still have my corporate day job (part time, just in the mornings) for another month.  I’m acting as kind of a consultant, as I’m training my own replacement.  In the afternoon I head over to the gun store for the rest of the day.  Let me tell you, it is rather liberating to be at your corporate job, but being past the point of caring what anyone thinks.  For the Halloween party there last week, I wore my OD TRUs, balaclava, and Level IV body armor.  Which, considering what I do for a living now, isn’t really a costume, but it was fun to rattle the liberals. 

 

“Ooohh… that’s scary… I hope you don’t come and shoot up the place…” or some variant was uttered by every candy-ass wimp there.  Why do people that are inherently pathetic think that is funny?  There’s all of these douche bags in the corporate world that think people like me are just waiting to go postal.  Why?  Because I like guns?  Doofuses.  Why should they worry?  They’ve got a NO GUNS policy, because we all know that will ward off evil. (roll eyes painfully)  But that is the beauty of being in your last month of corporate servitude before moving on to fulltime self employment, you can just look at them and say “Ha ha.  That’s funny… (then turn all serious) But, bitch, if you ever see me walk in here looking like this, on any day other than Halloween… run.”   

 

My kids love Halloween, partly for the absurd quantity of sugar, partly because they get to dress up.  I’ve got multiple little girls, and we’re slowly weaning them away from dressing as some sort of princess every year.  BARF.  Princess?   This is Halloween, damn it.  No, it is not an excuse to wear a poofy dress and a tiara, damn you Disney channel, damn you straight to hell.  At least this year I got them to dress as vampire princesses, so it was kind of a trade off, but definitely a step in the right direction.

 

My kids also know that I’m a B-Movie geek, and this is the time of year that I make efforts to find movies that they can watch with me.  This week, it was Gremlins, good old fashioned puppet based mayhem, and fun for the whole family.  And it warms the cockles of my heart to hear my 7 year old say “Well, that wouldn’t happen here.  That’s what shotguns are for.”  Good girl.  And even though I first saw this movie when I was like ten, I still love the scene with the mom takes out three of the little bastards with a blender, a butcher knife, and a microwave.  Ahh… good times. 

 

Happy Halloween! 

My company has a blog

We recently added a WordPress blog for my company, FBMG.  This is where we’ll be posting any information related to special events, machine gun shoots, classes, and that kind of thing.  www.fbmg.wordpress.com

Author of Utah Gun Laws to speak at FBMG on November 16th

Mitch Vilos, the premier expert on Utah gun laws, and author of the book, Utah Gun Law, will be speaking at FBMG on November 16th, at 6:00 PM.

 The latest edition of his book is in stock now.  I would recommend this to anyone interested in guns, concealed carry, or self defense.  Mitch is a great speaker, and will be available to answer questions. 

Movie Review, 30 Days Of Night

I just got back from a showing of 30 Days of Night. http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0389722/ and all I can say is, damn, that was one hard core vampire movie. 

 

Now regular readers know I’m a monster movie geek, and I love to review low budget B-Movies.  This is certainly no B-Movie, but it totally brought out my inner monster movie nerd. 

 

30 days is brutal, absolutely brutal.  If you don’t know the basic plot, you’ve been living in a cave, but basically vampires take over an Alaska town that has doesn’t see the sun for a month during winter.  They take out the communications and transportation, and then proceed to kill the hell out of the townsfolk. 

 

The movie is based on the graphic novel by Steve Niles, and if you’re a fan of Steve Niles, then you know that he can do no wrong.  The man is a friggin’ genius.  Check out his other work.  I had already read the book, and the story diverged a bit, but the overall feel was captured. 

 

The cinematography is excellent.  You get these constant great views of the town, that makes you realize how small and vulnerable it is.  The characters are believable, realistic, and you feel like you know them, and that makes it hurt more when they suffer.  In my opinion, Josh Hartnett is actually a pretty good actor who catches a bunch of crap because he’s a pretty boy.  He does a great job in this, but the scene stealer is Danny Huston, the lead vampire who absolutely dominates the screen.  He’s just one bad mother. 

 

And on the vampires, thank goodness that these aren’t those damn Anne Rice homo-erotic sissy vampires that have been foisted on us.  Damn it, I want my vampires to be evil, not “misunderstood”, and these vampires are monsters, pure and simple.  No poofery, no puffy sleeves and silk cravats, no angst, and thank you, no whiny-ass goth kids in capes and their mom’s purple eye-liner. And when your monsters are monsters, that means you can really love it when they get ground to bits by pieces of heavy equipment, and that is half the fun.  Plus, major bonus points for what was probably the best beheading scene I’ve ever seen. 

 

If you like an honest, kick in the gut, horror flick, you should catch this one. 

Pleasantly surprised, OR, Holy Crap, I’m actually selling books!

I’ve just got to post and say thanks.  I’ve been surprised by how many people have already pre-ordered copies of Monster Hunter International.   Seriously, thank you.

My whole goal with the pre-order is to get as many copies out there as possible, that way, by the time the book is available on Amazon, there will already be a bunch of folks that have read it, and hopefully liked it.   After getting kicked in the throat for two years by the publishing industry, I’ve decided to go it alone, and when you do that, your only hope is be a self-promoting son of a gun. 

I’ll admit, it is a really weird feeling though, to have random strangers giving you money for something out of your imagination.  It sure beats working for a living.

HK Demotivation, we just can’t stop…

h_and_k_m4.jpgfrom Robert Cruze.

This Week in the News, Oct 24th 2007

In world news, Happy United Nations Day!   No kidding, it really is.  The 24th of October is when we celebrate all of the awesomeness that comes from the UN, and all of the great things that they’ve accomplished for the world, like, uh… well… hmm… that’s a tough one.  (scratches head).  They bring us great public speakers, like that one evil dictator, and that crazy psychopath, and that other evil dictator, yeah, that’s important.  And they’ve prevented wars, like, uh… well, I’ll think of one eventually.  And they’ve halted genocide and famine… Nope, must be something else. 

 

They do issue a bunch of resolutions, and then wet themselves in fear when somebody actually does something.  Yep, that’s good.  Plus, it is a valuable place for special committees, like the Human Rights Committee, made up of Syria, Libya, North Korea, COBRA, Mongo, and Belgium, to meet and issue resolutions about how America sucks.

 

The UN heads up valuable groups, like The Who.  And The Who totally rocks… oh, wait, you mean they’re a rock band from England?  What the hell is this WHO?  World Health Organization?  Wtf?  Screw that.  You mean the group that is totally cool with millions dying of malaria because DDT is politically incorrect?  Never mind. 

 

Nope, the UN exists chiefly to piss sane people off.  The only good thing there was John Bolton, and he’s gone, so I figure we should just bulldoze the place and send them to the Azores where FDR originally thought about putting them.  Except that really isn’t fair to my relatives over there either. 

 

So, Happy UN Day everybody!  Hip-hip-fricking-hoo-ray!

 

In other national news, Southern California is on fire.  This has nothing at all to do with the fact that we’re no longer allowed to do controlled burns, or clear underbrush, because it may in fact harm the Spotted Snail-Darter-Fish-Bird-Toad, but the fires are totally because of Global Warming (per Harry Reid) and because all the National Guard’s fire engines are in Iraq (per Barbara Boxer). 

 

In Utah news, we’re having a vote on Referendum 1 next week.  It is about whether we should have vouchers in school, which allows parents to take some of that education tax money per kid, and use it to send their kid to a school of their choosing.  This of course freaks out the teacher’s unions, because you know, competition is great in every other facet of life in the friggin’ universe, but is BAD in education.   I swear that I actually heard the following radio commercial from the teacher’s union.

 

Concerned Mother:  I hear Referendum 1 will cause vouchers, and those will hurt Utah kids.

Concerned Father;  Yes, because choice in education is BAD, and will hurt Utah kids.  I feel this with my strong emotions.

Concerned Mother:  Yes, because private, religious, and charter schools are allowed to beat Utah children with phonebooks.  This will take money from public schools, which will cause outbreaks of hoof and mouth disease.

Concerned Father:  And private schools teachers aren’t even required to be certified, or pay union dues!   This means that Donald Rumsfeld will come to school and actually water board your children.

Concerned Mother:  The governor is mad, insane, drunk with power, and must be stopped!

Concerned Child:  Mommy… Donald Rumsfeld touched me inappropriately…

Concerned Mother:  NOOOO!!!!

Concerned Announcer:  Vote no on Referendum 1.  Brought to you by the Utah Education Association, George Soros, and the Reptoids of the Hollow Earth.

 

Give me a break.  The stats that have been tossed around on the news (which is always suspect anyway) says that the public schools get about $7,000 per kid.  A voucher gives the parent $3,000 per kid, which they can pay to the school of their choosing.  Which, though I’m a product of the public schools (El Nido Elementary, where half of us could speak English, and almost half of the English speakers could read!) leads me to believe that there would be $4,000 left for the public school, but no kid.  Now, despite my public school education, (which really did suck) seems like you now get money, but don’t have the correlating expense…  Which in a regular business, is a good thing.

 

But it isn’t about money, it’s about a threat to a monopoly, but the UEA (Utah Education Association) can’t come out and say that. 

 

Plus, come on.  $7,000 per kid?  Give me a classroom with 30 kids, and I got $210,000 for the year, I could drive them to school on a rocket bus, do science with actual Plutonium, and bring in Orson Scott Card to teach creative writing every Friday.  I know my kid’s teacher’s aren’t getting paid that much, so where the heck does public education manage to squander all my tax money?  

 

My wife was called yesterday by one of those “surveys” which is basically a UEA scare tactic to freak people out about the evil of vouchers.  My wife told her that she was in favor of vouchers, and the “surveyor” tried to talk her out of it.  My wife was told that vouchers will cause more overcrowded classrooms… Huh?  Okay, if I have 30 kids in class, and 3 kids leave to go to a private school, let’s see… 30-3=27.  The surveyor got kind of upset and hung up when my wife started to question how good public school math education is going. 

 

In other local news, Larry Correia finally sent his book off for publication.  All concerned citizens should buy it, because it is good, Larry needs to get paid, and everyone likes to read about monsters and how to blow them up.   The UEA and UN doesn’t want you to buy Monster Hunter International because it may cause wildfires and global warming.

Pre-Order for MHI is now up!

I put up the pre-order information for Monster Hunter International.  http://larrycorreia.wordpress.com/order-mhi/ 

I’m throwing in a free MHI patch, and I’ll autograph all the books.  Not that my signature is worth anything, but it makes me feel kinda cool. 

And for those of you that have already read MHI, I’ve just got one favor to ask.  Help me get this thing out there!  If you liked it, tell please tell your friends. 

Thanks

 -Larry Correia

Monster Hunter International: Novel Update

In about 4 weeks, I will have a proof copy in hand.  Once I approve the proof copy, then we’ll be shipping within a few weeks of that.  So, finally, finally, Monster Hunter International will be available. 

I’ll be putting up the first few chapters shortly, and arranging for the preorder. 

 Finally! 

EDIT:  I added the back cover blurb to the MHI page today. 

EDIT 2:  Chapter one is posted.  It has its own page.  Click the tab at the top of the page for the sample chapter.

Rejected Cartoons of Don Hertzfeldt

I found this on the blog, To Which I Replied, http://existingthing.blogspot.com/

I laughed so hard it hurt, then I brought my kids in and watched it again with them.  Their favorite is the one with the stolen eyeballs.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJYxCSXjhLI

That is some good stuff right there.

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